Just a quick update- after my 12 year old daughter self harmed I was referred for Family Counselling- this is still ongoing and although painful and upsetting (there is much in the past to deal with) I think it will liberate the girls in the long run. Last week the session was so hard that my eldest had to take two days off school she was so upset. But although thats counter productive I still think in the long run it will allow her and my younger daughter (18 and 12) to process all the family upheavals, alcoholism, broken marriage etc that they (and I ) have lived through in the past

It took a while but finally the 'For Sale' sign has appeared outside the FH. It's inevitable it has to be sold I guess and even though I love living there and my stbx has pushed for the sale so she can move on into her 'single life' it was me who actually put in all the hard work making ti sellable. I painted the outside pebble dash (despite her saying it wasn't necessary..all the feedback from estate agent/neighbours etc) has been positive, cleaned the carpets (once again she wouldn't contribute anything to the cost - I think if it looks presentable, smells nice and is clean it will sell

One of my favourite authors, Ann Patchett (she wrote Bel Canto, and Run, among other books I enjoyed long ago) has a book of autobiographical stories out called This is the Story of a Happy Marriage. I have not read it (I don't read or watch tv or anything anymore, tho I struggle with a pile of self help books like Runaway Husbands). (Apparently Patchett's first marriage lasted just a year, and then she was in a relationship for ten years before agreeing to marry her second, and is very happy.) Anyway - apparently in one of the stories a friend asks the author a