After reading other peoples blogs and my own again, I felt that I had come across as quite flippant about my seperation and impending divorce.

The truth is when it all happened, I was honestly devastated.

The first I noticed anything was wrong was August bank holiday. He had arranged to go to his Dad's down near Hastings, where his half brother and his girlfriend now live too - on his own without me, which was very unusual- but as I don't really drink and they can drink a small brewery dry, i thought fair enough, so I stayed at home on my own with the arangements that I would pick him up the

All my friends that I chat to will know I went to a charity ball in Londaon last night and that today is my birthday.

The ball was excellent and raised lots of cash for the childrens charity. At midnight, our table had champagne and they sang happy birthday to me.

10 minutes later I am in the ladies, crying my eyes out - why? Up until then, I had been having a great time. Me and my friend who came with me, bought some (2 bottles) wine and went back to my room where we sat and talked till 3am

I woke up this morning with a streaming cold, a really chesty cough which will be bronchitis by