Hi Everyone, I'm new here, and first time for me to write on any blog! so appologies in advance for long story and any gramatical errors!

Had been married for 24 yrs knew him for a year before we got hitched, have two lovley children now aged B,22 & G20 , he now ex services, discharged on medical grounds (2000)usual life experences that life throw's at you i feel either makes or brakes you in our case felt it had brought us closer, epecially 3 wk's after we were wed he was diagnosed with cancer (sucessfully treated after op and follow up treatment) lived in the south west (SW) prior to moving

So, after nearly 1 1/2 years of being unhappily married and wishing I had the strength to leave him - we finally agreed that this marriage wasnt working! - I would move out with our two daughters.

Thankfully, I thought it would be easy - so often had I thought of how I would react; I was feeling strong and wouldnt be "bullied" or "put down" and made to feel insignificant in comparison.

But that all failed - miserably - a few choice words from him and i'm feeling depressed and suicidal again!! - damn - i must not let him bully and push me around.

He has offered me a lump sum of money and an

Well 15 months of hell and probably a year to go the depression has kicked in and the sheer hell of those expensive solicitor bills. Hanging on by the thread of my knickers but i'm not done yet! First hearing been and gone and the fdr looms ahead fighting for what I dont know because all we have is debt. No money for anyone will be left but still he buries his head. No mortgage payments will he give and the house is the only asset. Is he mad I dont know perhaps he's lost his head.

Cant pay much longer that I know and feeling weaker by the day. Perhaps i'll have some new knickers soon without