This blogging seems to be very therapeutic. I was really encouraged by the three replies to my first blog, SOMEONE OUT THERE CARES. I would like to reply to the people who commented below

 Marriaa

Thanks for the comments, I am sure that you are correct in that the emotions one experiences come in different orders for different people, sorry to hear that you are having to cope with loss at the moment, loss is a difficult emotion to deal with as there does not appear any way to channel the emotion into something / somewhere positive. I will certainly join chat, although I often have difficulties

Firstly I would like to say this blogging is great, I can not believe how much I change day to day.

After ten years I found out the lady I thought I knew so well was having an affair. Now I know everyone will say this but she really was not the type, I have asked her who her new fellow is and she has told me lie after lie. For example she told that he was 30, divorsed and had two kids then on Monday she said that none of this was true and she will not even tell me his real age.

Now my ex was never much of a talker she was quite shy, the way I found out that she was having an afair was that

...something comes along and knocks you down.

I thought I was doing so much better. My son went away for 9 days with his mother. I had a really hard time, but the report back was that he was doing okay on this visit, which made me feel much better about the whole thing.

I drove to California to pick him up the day before Mother's Day, and I met with his mother for a bit before she went back to her house. There wasn't much for us to say to eachother, so I guess that means I have come to realize there is nothing left but memories. As I was putting my son in my car and getting ready to leave,