Blog Entries tagged 'choosing to stay or go'

#5 Beware the shops!

caladan08@gmail.com — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Not blogged awhile and so much to write as so much happens emotionally. Nothing much has changed but the last week has brought home how hard this is for me, how different my and my stbxs experiences are.
I posted in the forums about how to tell the kids we've split as i see that as the very first public step to acknowledging we have split- after a year! Everything else is in private, or with trusted friends.For me, this week started well, feeling strong with that post and some great rep [...]

Jekyl and Hyde...my ex

emilyjosedgwick@aol.com — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Hi All

For those that have met me, probably think im one big party animal but im not all the time, I still have feelings and still get very down. Havent blogged for a while and yes I love to party really love it but we cant be party animals all the time!

It all happened with me last Thursday and was saying to peeps how good I have been with no contact ect for 5 weeks and the rest.

That particular day got a bit silly as was having a clear out and came across [...]

He has taken everything, just as I said

kerrypix@hotmail.com — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Hi all

Hope you are doing ok. The weather is so pants, it makes you feel down before you do anything!

Following on from my blog about my husband trying to kill himself and a previous one about the fact that he will take everything from me, this will confirm what I thought.

My x2b had an affair for 7months and decided he wanted to come home after doing so much to me and putting me through so much. Because I said no and I no longer want to be with him, he tried seriously to ta [...]

Feeling utterly wretched today

andrewcbaillie@msn.com — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Firstly, may I apologise.

I haven't been in wiki for some weeks.

Before, people used to comment on my blog with very positive c0mments, and with all of the support and understanding I received, I felt strong enough to take life on by myself.

Silly me!

What I forgot however is that - people don't really change. Neither should they, I guess. I mean, I know my wife is very controlling, and that's the reason why we clash, but it's absolutely not my place t [...]

Things seem to be going really well

Jeannie@hotmail.co.uk — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Hi everyone,

I have not been on wiki for a while I have been rather busy trying to get my life back on track and funnily enough things seem to be getting a lot better for me.

I decided to give it another go with my husband and although he has not yet moved back into the FMH I think maybe it is only a matter of time before he does.

As some of you will know he had an affair with a girl I used to work with and I caught him just before xmas last year. &nbs [...]

Did I get it all wrong?

christian2williams@hotmail.com — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Never written a blog before, but this seems like a good idea right now and will hopefully be something to look back on when my head stops spinning like a washing machine!! Needless to say that confused is only one of several emotions I feel at the moment.

My wife and I married three and a half years ago. She had been diagnosed as type one diabetic about six months before, at the time, we'd been together for around 12 years, we had both just turned 30 and decided now was a good [...]

It's going great - an update

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

I have had quite a few emails asking how the reconciliation is going. Wasn't sure about blogging as feel a bit out of place on a divorce website saying how a reconciliation is going.

Well it has been hard. Reconciliation is no easy path. But after a few initial rough patches we are doing great. We are dating and texting like teenagers, it is fantastic. We won't live together for a while as it's like starting a new relationship. He stays over at the weekend and one [...]

I need advise...

saharvrad66@hotmail.com — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Me and my husband have been married in almost 2 years. It has been a very tough and hard journey for me and him. I am going to try to make this short...

First of we got married after 4 months of dating ( the reason being he knew if we didn't get married I had to retun back home because my visa was expiring) and his way of proposing was " well i know i wanna marry you one day, you have all the qualities I love with a women so lets do it ".

We have fou [...]

Moving on...

annetteca08@gmail.com — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 01:00:00 +0100

2006 ... we took a family holiday to Florida. While there a male friend of mine who I had met on the Internet came to see us. His wife had left him and he'd got divorced a few months earlier, he was lonely and missed family life, so liked to come a spend a little time with us. Before we left he told me he was falling for me, and I must admit I was flattered. He thought he was over his wife but he soon realised, when he spoke to her again on the ph [...]

Just when I thought I was doing ok

mneme2006@yahoo.co.uk — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Why am I still not able to just deal with this, and put it to rest? It's been four years since the trouble really began. I am at the point of divorcing him. Something is stopping me. Perhaps it's knowing that this is (usually) an irrevocable step.

If he would just leave me to recover, and support me financially while I do so, he might, even now, be able to turn this around.

I am so scared of saying this to him, because when I suggest i [...]

Thinking Time

flopsybunny_uk@yahoo.co.uk — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Ive had the house to myself since Friday morning - the first time since March. This girls are away all weekend, as thier father was getting married yesterday. I've no feelings either way about his marriage - we ended our 9 year relationship some 7 years ago, so any feelings I had for him have been long gone.

Ive been a bit of a sadsack these past couple of days, mooching about the house, with little idea of how to occupy myself - I start a [...]

Trying to let go and move on

dawnuk57@yahoo.com — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

We lived together 3 years, bought a nice house and got married. We didnt have children as i couldn't stay pregnant for long, always miscarried around 8 weeks! Hubby had 4 kids from 1st marriage and we all got on pretty well, they stayed with us some weekends & on holidays, they lived away so contact wasnt constant.

I thought we happy together on the whole, despite his problems with alcohol & pill addiction (codeine dependency).

I encouraged him to leave his employmennt [...]

Yesterday

Jeannie@hotmail.co.uk — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Yesterday was a very difficult day for me i had to take the contents of my mum's room up to the home she is moving into i got stbx to come round with his van to help me after all it is a direct result of his affair that my mum has to go there at all.

He wants us to get back together and start afresh but everytime i am with him i just feel anger and it always ends in me giving him what for. He does not say a lot he would prefer it if we jus [...]

Some great news:-D

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Wow, I had said before my life changes direction every few hours at the moment. Well after his declaration of his way or the highway which I said in your dreams matey to and then told him if he was to stand any chance of working things out then he and the bartart couldn't even be friends, I also said I needed space and didn't want to see him - so last night (without telling me) he went to see her and told her he was going to work it out with me and would not see her anymore even in a [...]

A date, then no date.

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

God he is a fruit loop. BUT next friday night we are having a date. He has agreed to try from beginning. Not holding breath but I said i needed space and was backing off so he came running forward. We'll see. Not giving up yet on 19yrs. It is a proper first date type date, scary...........

Update - probabaly no date will happen as I decided enough was enough with his gob and said again she is to be no part of his life friend only or not. I told him I was not competing for him [...]

His way or the highway

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Well thats my option. He has no intention of introducing me to his friends. He said I was pi**ing him off by asking. He said be patient and wait and see. It is his way or no way. I said that was not good enough and unless he had something to hide then surely his friends would be happy to see him reconcile his marriage. He went off on one that I had told a couple of close friends that we had a chance.

Now to me it all says he has something to hide even though he denies it and accuse [...]

Strange days.

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

What weird days these are. I think I am coming out the other end, I woke up this morning and didn't think I want to die, I felt calm. I really did want not to be alive on many days but I kept coming to wiki and peeps always picked me up. Hopefully no panic attacks today either. This improvement can't be the pills yet as they haven't had time to kick in yet. I think the fact I have now been open with the gp about how I feel and taken control has made me feel better. I first th [...]

Question/Advice 1 of Many- Can She Kick me Out?

keithmash@hotmail.co.uk — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

OK,

Pointless mixing the issues. Am like many of us going through a bitter divorce and stbx seems to be getting it all her own way.

I live in Holland mid week and only get to see the kids at weekends. Now stbx wants me to stop coming home until the divorce is final. So Christmas I need of stay away, my parents live 5 hours away and it is really not suitable.

As a man it seems hat I have little or no rights - at least it feels like it.

Can she stop me [...]

A long week

memorcarpediem@yahoo.co.uk — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

I think this has been the worst week I have ever had. After my last blog where he said he didn't love me I hit the bottom. I wouldn't commit suicide but it's what my brain was telling me to do, I was throwing up, non stop crying and well you all know what it's like. It got worse on friday as my 15yr old had enough and went to my sisters. Before people think why didn't I go to the dr before to get help, I couldn't, I was waiting for a medical report to be done for a new [...]

Should I Tell Her?

macrae.macrae@btopenworld.com — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Another session with the x2b including me virtually begging her to stop all this hurt and try to work things out with me but she says she has moved on and does not want to be married to me - heard that somewhere before - but I just can't accept it.

Over the last month she has lost a lot of weight and at the weekend had her hair done (yes I was on kid duty) and now looks just like the stunning woman I married 15 years ago, I feel so gutted and jealous she has the [...]