Blog Entries for Zanth45

First session in court on 5 November

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Wednesday was the first session in court to sort out finances with my stbx. I have to say it was a 'disturbing', unpleasant experience. It really seams that 'the screws are being tightened' on me as we move towards reaching a final settlement.

I saw my solicitor last week to review my stbx's form E. My solicitor pointed out a few discrepancies she and her colleage had noticed. One thing was the number of old life insurance policies stbx had pu [...]

Decree Nisi Read in Court Today

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Today, or rather yesterday, 8 September, the Decree Nisi was read in court. I was thinking about it as I sat at home today but it was as if nothing had changed. There was only a slight hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach.

My STBX came home from work and did not mention a word about the Decree Nisi. I made no comment. It was best not to say anything. Divorce seems to be taken as such a 'normal' thing these days. People I have known for year [...]

Decree Nisi and Letting Go of my Marriage.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Have just found out that my Decree Nisi is set for early September. Receiving the solicitor's letter was yet another 'blow' in this long and painful process. Although I knew the Decree Nisi would come, it still felt like a shock to actually read the words. The letter said that my husband is entitled to a divorce on the grounds of 'unreasonable behaviour' which, even after 8 months into the process, I find deeply hurtful and ironic. (In different cir [...]

Excluded from my children's lives and ignored.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 01:00:00 +0100

It is nearly the end of my son's final year at junior school. Each year, pupils going on to secondary education present a special school play. Neither my ex-husband to be nor the children bothered to tell me this play was on tonight.

The two children and ex-to-be just went out of the door earlier this evening. I thought they were going to the gym or swimming pool. I had no idea it was to this special play. It meant that I missed an important event in my [...]

Wishing this had never happened. It should not be happening.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 01:00:00 +0100

My mind has been drifting back to when I was first married to my ex to be and all the plans we had for the future. He was my soulmate. He was the one who rescued me from all the nasty things in life - he protected me.

When we had our first baby, I began to feel complete and valid as a person. Our baby seemed like a special gift from God because we were blessed - so it seemed. With our second child our family seemed almost complete. We went places, did thing [...]

Hello all! Have been away from this site for 4 months.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 01:00:00 +0100

I went abroad for 3 weeks in March to visit relatives. We had been out of touch, almost estranged for some 11 years. However, unexpectedly they have offered to support me while I go through this divorce. This support has been mainly emotional but they have also offered to become advocates for me when I see my solicitor etc. I am very greatful for this - it is more than I expected. I had lost hope of finding any friends in my predicament.

[...]

Trouble with in-laws.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0100

My husband's sister brought my 13 year old daughter home today. She had been staying with her aunt during the half-term holiday. This was an awkward situation because it appears that 'sister-in-law' has taken a judgemental stance against me.

She just barged into the house and made herself at home without being asked. My presence was not even acknowledged. She made cups of tea and a meal for herself, my (to be ex) husband and the children while I was ignored.

S [...]

Shopped to Police only to get insurance money

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0100

On Wednesday 13 February I had to attend the local police station to make a statement about the damage I did to my husband's car after he suddenly announced he was bringing divorce proceedings against me. My husband assured me that this was just to make and sign a statement to admit my 'offense'.

At the station, the PC explained that the process would only take an hour and a half. A criminal claims solicitor was present. She also gave an explanation of what would happe [...]

Overwhelmed with feeling of anger, hurt and injustice.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 00:00:00 +0100

My husband has taken the children away for 3 days during the school half-term holidays. This is to give us all some 'breathing space'. Our divorce process is likely to take about 6 months. My solicitor has advised me to stay living in the ex-matrimonial home until the divorce is settled. However, it is very difficult living with my husband without experiencing extreme irritation, which can lead to arguments. My husband's behaviour always seems stressed, he is always fidgitin [...]

Everything has been taken away from me.

louise.bowen10@yahoo.co.uk — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 00:00:00 +0100

We seemed to have a normal Christmas - but my husband did not really seem to be 'himself' somehow. He seemed to be restless and on edge. Then, on 3 January 2008, he suddenly announced he was taking divorce proceedings against me. I thought he must be joking, he was not thinking straight. He said he was serious, it was the only course of action. He said he was divorcing me because of my credit card debts (he also has credit card debts) and because of my ongoing mental health problems [...]