Blog Entries for bertie670

Social services update

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Had a visit from social services tonight, mainly to see the children. I think the social worker was quite surprised to hear what has been going on and rather encouragingly said I was doing the right things. Both oup GP and the school have raised concerns - about time too.

This morning I was given a note, via the children that she was too drunk to take the children to school and so would I take them or get a taxi arranged!

I think it is all starting to move forwards a l [...]

Drunk again

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

I feel so sad for the children today (and for her in an odd way). Saturday both children asked to come with me for the day when they should have been with their mother. When we got home about 6pm she was plastered, I reckon between 2 and 3 bottles of red wine and she is passed out in bed.

Sunday she has nothing planned but as it is 'my day' with the children she doesn't want anything to do with them. So we have a good time, swimming, roast lunch and some shopping for schoo [...]

Social services

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Now we have social services involved in this. Not just Cafcass but the child care team. I don't know if this is good or bad as I have yet to speak to the case officer myself. stbx has been interviewed and apparently children are to be seen tomorrow but no-one seems to know for sure and no appointment has been made. I am guessing that our GP has contacted them but it could have been the school although they wre reluctant to action things.

I think I said last t [...]

It's getting worse

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Not been here for quite a while but life is getting just too frantic to find time for much else.

I am now doing nearly all the childcare as well as working full time while she spends all day in the spa/health club with a lot of time in the pub or a bar somewhere.

It has now got to the stage where the school don't want her to collect the children in the afternoon because there have been 4 times that she has rolled up smelling of alcohol and they are about to inform social serv [...]

Thanks for wikiween

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 01:00:00 +0100

A rather late thank you to Sarah and all her helpers for a great evening on saturday. We all had a lively time and it was good to catch up with a few old aquaitances and make some new ones.

Had a great half term with the children doing all sorts of different things which they both enjoyed - as did I although it is pretty tiring with them all day long but worth it.

Statements now exchanged for childrens case so now just waiting for the court date. There is little to cho [...]

Half term

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Having a great week so far with the children down in Devon.

We saw my grandad for lunch on Friday and at 94 he is pretty perky, hope I have his jest for life in 50 years time, even trying to chat up the waitress!! Since then we have been cycling, swimming, fishing(unsuccessfully),Saturday cinema only £1 per child, what a bargain, and banger racing - that was a laugh which even my 10 yr old daughter enjoyed.

Tomorrow is a shopping day as daughter has no wi [...]

A busy month

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 01:00:00 +0100

I cannot believe it is a month since I last wrote this, how time flies whn you are enjoying yourself.

I think I have reached the stage where I don't need to write it all down now, life is very slowly moving on but not much has changed.

We are still in the same house, although we totally avoid each other. I seem to be doing most of the family things and I am really enjoying the time with the children. My daughter sat the 11+ and we have been to see all the sec [...]

Delayed but furious reaction

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Had the most bizarre evening yesterday. We had first directions appointment on wednesday and it took until yesterday for her to react. Apparently I was thrown out of court as the judge didn't agree to the request for a s7 welfare report.

It all kicked off after the children had been put to bed by me, as usual, and so I go downstairs to get some supper. She arrives in kitchen having had 1/2 bottle wine and lights up in the kitchen as I am preparing food. She n [...]

Court report

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Have had first hearing this morning for the children. This was a directions appointment to decide how we proceed from here. She was represented by counsel, apparently because her legal advisor (may not be a solicitor) wasn't sure what would happen today. A little odd I think.

We were not granted a Welfare report or the testing for alcohol use, but she did acknowledge in court she uses alcohol (above the recommended level) and is on anti depressants.&nbs [...]

Court prep pt2

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Just a quick update having seen solicitor. We will be seeking a welfare report and also a hair test(!). I had not heard of this before but apparently you can test for drugs from a sample of hair and this now extends to alcohol as well as stronger drugs. This is often used in childcare cases.

Her solicitor has written asking that I move out of the MH but have been advised to sit tight for now. The argument being that as I am concerned for the children and so I sho [...]

Court preparation

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Getting ready for first court hearing this week. Have got all the papers in order and seeing solicitor tomorrow to ensure that we have our arguments straight. We have a lot to do to convince the court that my application for joint residence should be granted. Will probaly seek a welfare report as well as Cafcass seem to have ignore what they were being told. In fact their report is so feeble it is of no help to anyone, including the court. Just [...]

Mixed messages

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Email from solicitor today was not what i wanted to hear. Cafcass report doesn't help my case, although I haven't seen it yet, and solicitor doesn't seem very encouraging.

Cafcass officer doesn't seem to have taken on board anything from the 2 meetings. Now I have to hope that I/we can get some of it out in court.

Life at home is becoming pretty grim, living with an alcoholic depressive who won't accept any responsibilty for her future or the childr [...]

Sex

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

What a weekend, travelled across the whole country, got soaked and sunburnt and still didn't get any!!

But it did get your attention and it makes me smile to think about it again. I think over that last year or so any sort of physical relationship has been absolutely the last thing on my mind, now well who knows.

So to update the blog, working away last weekend so didn't see children until sunday evening. Both very tired and having done next to nothing as far a [...]

Cafcass part 2

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Yesterday was the childrens interview by Cafcass to help the cafcass officer reach a conclusion re his recommendations to court. I arrived 5 mins early to find they had already started which I was disappointed about. I wanted the children to see I was there in support. This also forms the childrens statement to court, so quite important.

Not sure it made much difference to what the children said however. Feedback from cafcass officer sounded helpful to me - they [...]

Childcare

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

Those following this blog will know I am pushing hard for equal residence for our children. This is not easy on any of us, made worse by still all living in the same house. Thats another story but has got to be addressed as soon as possible. It's now almost intollerable and certainly not good for the children. Roll on 24th when we have the first hearing.

Cafcass are interviewing the children this week. stbx is pretty unhappy about this. cannot acc [...]

Fun weekend

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

So here I am on my way back form London having met lots of wikifolks last night and the attending a food show today. Ate too much at both events.

thanks to everyone who contributed to lastnights get together in London, especially Sarah who did all the hard work - hope you managed to enjoy the evening sarah, nice shoes by the way. Didn't get a chance to comment last night!!

It was interesting to hear all the plans that there are for the site and i hope i [...]

Cafcass

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 01:00:00 +0100

No time to be on here at all really. Grabbing time when possible but many people to ring tonight after the first Cafcass meeting today.

Meeting not so bad, stbx got very excitable, emotional and specific in her comments about me. I could see the cafcass officer looking quite surprised at times and despite him trying to tell her what was required etc I am not sure she took it in.

Anyway good comments that I took from it were that courts do not want to impose [...]

Weekly update

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 01:00:00 +0100

My blogging is getting less frequent, about once a week now. Not that less is happening, just I am finding less opportunity to be on here.

So far this week we have had an argument about opening a door, me bringing some work home, who should walk the dog, why the children don't want cold chicken for tea, she standing over me while I take a call from my employer at 7pm telling me I am only paid to 5pm. And to cap things off she locked me out on one night as I left to calm [...]

Quiet week

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 01:00:00 +0100

She is away with the children at her sisters so I have the place to myself (with the dogs and goldfish to look after). I have always enjoyed time on my own and after the past few months I am again enjoying the space. I miss the hubbub of the children and hearing their stories and daft ideas but they sound happy on the phone.

First Directions Appointment hearing for the Childrens Order is now scheduled and so we have Cafcass to deal with. I expect that [...]

Dogs

bertie1670@googlemail.com — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 01:00:00 +0100

No much to report this week, I have spent as much time in the office as possible to avoid her.

This is her 2 week 'holiday', even though she is out of work now. She was going away to family but having fallen out with them all she is back at home. At least I am seeing the children who are being great. Who knows what they make of it all.

Father in law has ben staying this week as well to add to the fun, sharing a room with his daughter (ie stbx). Don't think that is [...]