Dreaming,
Pensions can be a messy business. It depends on your ages and the size of the pension and the type of pension (be it money purchase or final salary). The more info you can post, the better advice that can be given.

Yes, by all means gree something between yourselves if you are able, but whaether you use mediation or not (and I fully support kalamari's points above about the advantages) you MUST both take independant legal advice before signing an agreement - otherwise after it is ratified by a court, one or other could cry 'foul' and say that the agreement was unfair for x, y or z reason, resulting in the agreement being set aside and having to start again from a new asset position further down the line.

Mike

Thank you - hope things improve foryou.