Anyone got any stories about mediation in general?

My beef is this:

If I consent to mediation, I will have to pay. I would prefer to sort out amicably outside of mediation but ex's solicitor although member of resolution is determined to be antagonistic. My ex is weak and has no idea how to sort thing out on his own.

As I'm self repping, it would be cheaper for me to go for Ancillary relief and as I was told by former solicitor that I have a good case, I feel that I can see it through with the help of all the good people on Wiki.

Any views?

It will all come down to your communications with your ex. Before he had a solicitor; mine was happy to amicably chat over coffee in our living room.

Once they became involved - he became uncharacteristically weak; it's as though they've got a spell on him. I initiated Mediation, he came twice, before his sols told him NOT to make me an offer.

You ought to INVITE an arena you can mediate in. (Over coffee etc) and INVITE an open disclosure of finances for each others' consideration. He can then take any proposals to his sol to check.

You can only lead the horse to water....

A Court will have expected that you Mediate. I think it'll work in your favour to have been actively seen to attempt this. Put everything in writing to him. If it does become disputed later; and you may be liable to his legal costs; you can at least prove that you've attempted to settle away from Litigation.

Don't assume that because you're self-repping that the Courts are there to do it all for free! My situation proves this! I am the respondent in the Case; so I have no choice but to go through that process.

I have attempted to settle away from litigation but he is not communicating with me at the moment and neither are his solicitors. This is why I am looking at Form A as I write this.

I do not want to go to mediation as I will have to pay and I don't think he'll agree to the outcome as it will most probably be in my favour.

I hadn't heard this one before: A Court will have expected that you Mediate.

I can understand court expecting you to negotiate in some form but not neccessarily forced to go to one of these mediation scenarios.

Our judge apparently expects things to be sorted out nicely.

Mediation remains voluntary, and if things have stooped so low as to neither him nor his representatives replying; then I'm sure AR proceedings are your only route.

Are there disputes over valuations? If so, expect to pay hundreds for Witness Valuation Reports (for properties, pensions etc) Even if you're doing things as a LiP - there's still huge expenses, court fees etc. I've spent more than £100 just on photo-copies! (Keep copy for self, supply sols, supply his sols, supply court) etc.

Do you have the skills to produce Trial Bundles etc; if this were to run to a fully contested Hearing? Can you cross-examine? present an argument? Sum up your case for the judge at the end of it? Do you know Section 25?

Yes I am very good administratively and I did cross examine someone I took to small claims court. Won the case and judge said he was very impressed with my arguments and cross examination.

I think I could sum up my case, in fact I've done it already when I sent letter to his solictor after them threatening me without knowing all the facts.

I know section 25 nearly off by heart but I don't know yet about trial bundles.

Hi Lady in Blue,

This may be of help:

http://www.parkcourtchambers.co.uk/seminar-handouts/23.1.07%20FDR%20_A%20Beattie_.pdf

and the practice direction to follow when preparing bundles is:

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/cms/files/practice_direction_court_bundles.pdf

Hope that is of help.

YA

Thanks again YA.