Firstly, please note that Ben is an alias and I am actually a female writing on behalf of my partner!

My partner (age 34) has been going through a divorce for the last year. He was married to his wife(age 30) for a year and a half and they have a four year old. He has happily paid all the bills for the last year (£1,500 per month), in the agreement (between himself and his wife) that his wife remained in the house with his child until she could sell it, and she would get 100% of the house instead of splitting it. They agreed the following:

Wife gets:

100% of house
All of contents
£27k loan paid off by husband for her business she set up and subsequently went bust
£4k car
Then child maintenance of £500 (as standard) and £500 for the wife (for 5 years) and 15% of my partners bonus every year.

The wife then decided it wasn't enough and went to a solicitor, and we have exchanged form E's etc and had the FDA. The FDR is not until early Dec 08.

The wife currently earns £1,200 per month (working a 30 hour week) and my partner earns £3,600 per month. Their son goes to private nursery 4 days a week from 8am - 5pm.

She has now said that she wants £1,800k per month (including child maintenance), so in effect £1,300 per month spousal payments for her until their son goes to school.

My partner lives with me now (pays me rent), and his outgoings are £1,800 per month. His wife took the house off the market 6 months ago as she found it too stressful (!) She has a new partner now (they don't live together, but it sounds like it could be on the cards). She now wants to sell the house.

Please can someone tell me if this is a reasonable request, bearing in mind all that my Partner has offered her so far? My partner is a fantastic dad and has been completely honest but has said enough is enough and £1,800 per month is extortionate.

Ben Her ..

On the face of it, everything sounds reasonable .. but I am afraid to give you an honest opinion we would need to know more.

The marriage was short - but did they cohabit beforehand? For how long?

What is the current value of the FMH ... and what is the equity??

Has he any savings, shares etc. You mention an annual bonus.

What about pension?

Can the wife afford to house herself and the child with the money she will have??

Has the wife applied for tax credits and help with childcare costs??

1800 a month plus her 1200 earnings would give her 3k a month .. while your partner has 1800 to live on.... given that CM on his income shd be about 540, this would seem excessive .. although he does share his living costs with you.

Tell us a bit more and we will try to help.

HAdenoughnow

Hiya!

Thank you so much for coming back to me.

They cohabited for 2 years beforehand.

The current value of the FMH is £240k - the equity has now all gone. When she took the property off the market 6 months ago, my partner told her she would lose out with the market going downhill, but she was insistant that it was too stressful and she wanted to wait until all the finances were solved. He carried on paying the bills and mortgage until the finances would be solved. She told him to assume she wanted to stay there.

Now she has changed her mind (we think this is due to the boyfriend she has) and she wants to sell.

He has no savings now - they split them when they finished - 65% and 35% in her favour. She has 7k sitting in her main account untouched from this.

He gets a good bonus - discretionary, but he works in the financial markets, so thats going to drop next year!

He has a pension, she has none, but she has not asked to touch the pension.

She gets £900 in benefits and childcare assistance.

She is in a 3 bed house and we are in my one bed flat, so we want to get a house so his son can stay with us when on access.

His costs of £1,800 per month are all paid by him, I have my own living costs to pay!!

Please note (in case you were not clear) that the £1800 is inclusive of the child maintenance.

One final point - she is a self employed contractor working for one company. They pay her £1200 per month but she withdraws £450 of that for herself and leaves the rest in the account. She said that the rest is for her tax bill and NI, and the 2 weeks that the company closes at Christmas so she has money for herself. Don't even get me started!!!!

Thanking you kindly in advance.

Ben Her (!!)