wifesgone hawaythelads?

hawaythelads,

I can feel the pain in you writing. You have been through so much more than me and I feel bad. It seems so unfair for you that she is the one that had the affair and she comes out of this ok.

We all have to go through a grieving process. The period of grieving is different for everyone. I am still grieving and hurting after 10 months. I have no intention of doing this forever and constantly try my best to have a good day. It doesn't always happen but I don't beat myself up about it, I try again the next day.

Think about how your life would be in the future if you always felt like this.... what a waste of YOUR life. Good will come to us all eventually if we want it to.

I know I will never forgive, and I am ok with that, but I know I will not go on dwelling over the things he has done. I desperately want to feel happy again in my life and I guess you do to.

I wish you well and hope that these bad days dwindle away so that you can start to build back your life. I WILL build my life back... but it will take time. She has ruined a part of your life but you must not let her ruin the rest of it.

CandyW

hawaythelads

Jeez your ex-wife seems to have been brought up in the same school of morality as my ex-wife - not the same perseon are they?

My ex is also on her third man of 2008 whilst I am happy and settled with my new girl, a prettier and younger model which has rather annoyed my ex a touch, shame.

I can feel your pain, I feel exactly as you do, my ex did it to me whilst pregnant which makes it even harder to take.
She was out with her other man until 3.30am on the day the bay was due, and she went into labour at 6.30am (I new nothing of the affair then) 3 hours later . She then texted her lover whilst still lied in the afterbirth!Then she accuses me of unreasonable behaviour, and is currently trying to ruin me financially and trying to take the baby out of my life and my sons life .

Forgiveness in our situation I think is impossible, but the anger will fade in time.

What really, really matters to me is that I can rest my head on the pillow every night with a clear conscience, and will do for the rest of my life, come what may.

And I thoroughly belive in the saying 'What goes around, comes around'. Keep your chin up.

Hi all
10 years on, I have never forgotten.
Forgiving, mmmmmm dont think so, as I have watched my two boys struggle through their lives after he walked away and did not bother much with them, or even try and help them.
NO the hatred grows. Oh he is now with his new model, two more children, and had the cheek to tell me on arrival of his first child, 'it seems better the second time around'
BASTARD of course it is I helped him build everything up, I was left with no recognition for that, so he moved on with loadsa money, of course disposable nappies were not a problem, when I used to have to boil the terry ones because we had no money whatsoever.
Forgiveness no, will never to that. I just wonder what will happen when the younger model gets fed up with the old man. (he is 13 years older than her).
It is hard and we all think we are forviging, have to be pretty insensitive not to have strong emotions about it all.
zara

PS
Acceptance - Yep I have accepted that he was a lying cheating selfish git.

Thanks for that, Zara,
I had to look up the word git in the dictionary just to make sure I understand the word correctly (=worthless person) and together with all the attributes you chose it made me laugh. Not sure why, I guess I am really getting over him.
Petrof

I will never forgive my narcissistic x,who over 35 years totally isolated me from my family and friends and then systematically controlled and destroyed my life, my self esteem,my self worth, my health, my career and everything else to achieve the life­style­ he wanted for himself, regardless of others.
Did x stop there? No!
he even tried to persuade me I was mentally ill and offered to fix it so that I could be admitted to the local psychiatric hospital..Why? because I was desperately ill at home with asthma and pneumonia unable to breathe and I said I was scared of being on my own in an empty house when he went out socializing with his fishing friends.
X would not call doctor or ambulance, leaving me alone struggling to breathe. he concluded my fear was acute paranoia and not my fear of being left alone to possibly die as I believe he intended given his total disregard and indifference.X left me like that for a whole week before I finally managed to crawl to the bathroom and ring for medical help.
So no forgiveness.
Acceptance.. that he is one the lowest scum bags on this planet and I'm lucky to have survived and to fight him for my freedom ...yes.