This is just to say hello dont really know where to start but my main problem at the mo is splitting the equity in the property as my hub wants 50%, and the fact that I dont wish to go to court as its all too costly !! Plus he bad mouths me to the children (2 girls 9 and 6 years old) so lifes a bit tough at the mo !!! But I try to keep upbeat and friends tell me I am doing a great job!!! so I'll leave it here and see what transpires

Dodgygit,

Welcome to wikivorce.

Two children that age? He wants 50%? Hmmm methinks unlikely, but you would need to post a lot more info about your finances and assets for someone to geive you a guess at a 'fair' outcome.

Try the wikivorce calculator (­link­ on frontpage) to give you an idea of what might be reasonable.

Has he or you sought any legal advice on your situation?

Mike

thanx mike yeah I know I need 2 put a lot more which I will do. Actually I did do a rough attempt at the calculator and it said i wud get 70%. By the way he is about 2 move in with sum1 after only bein split 4 5 mnths, which Ive bin lead 2 believe will also go against him financially!! yes Ive got solicitor but if this goes 2 court the costs wud b 8-12k!! As I only work part time want 2 avoid this and he wont go 2 mediation so feel a bit between a rock and a hardplace !!!

Dodgy,

4.5 months is a long time compared to some tales here... Don't make it any easier though...

Yes, the mediation route is far and away the best to take if you can get him to play ball.

Take advantage of Wikivorce and save yourself as much time with your solicitor as possible - thre is a lot of knowledge and experience here.

He too needs to stop and think a bit here. Throw 8-12K EACH at solicitors, or sit down around a table and be sensible? Tough call, but as the old experession goes - 'you can lead a horse to water, stick its nose in, jump up nad down on it's head, but if it isn't thirsty, it won't drink.'

He needs to hear it from someone independant, rather than his own solicitor, who will only benefit from making the proceedings drag out.

Why not see if you can make a mediation appointment for both of you?

Have a read at this thread (click on the ­link­ below)

http://www.wikivorce.com/divorce/Divorce-Forum/Mediation/3393-Anyone-been-through-mediation.html

Mike

Hi dodgygit,

Mike has really said it all and all I want to add is be strong and make sure you get a fair and just settlement.

It will be a fight, but you and your children deserve it. If he won't go to mediation then tell him you will go to court and are willing to fight all the way.

Why should you and his children theoretically subsidise his new life?

He was the one who choose this course of action, now he must pay for it.

Keep smiling and have a good night

XXX Fleur XXX

thanx Fleur will do x

im like you but my kids are 1 & 4 we also want to do it cheaply im afraid thta by not using solicitor i wont get everything im en­title­d to also his suggestion for maintenance is low considering his income less than half the 20 suggestsed my 4 year old keeps telling me if i were tideir etc things would be better my friends also tell me how great im doing with kids but what about me and what i want and need how about a night out for starters