Having already spent several thousand (was given an estimate of much less for the whole process) just reaching the Nisi stage I'm getting very nervous as to future costs. My stbx has been very unco-operative over supplying financial details as he believes what his his and ours is now his and hers. He is however also nervous of future costs. His Solicitor is pressing him to apply for a court date even though he is the one who has held everything up, she has told him that this will cost about £240:00 plus 'a little bit more' to get the financial settlement through. In view of a comment she made regarding a SMALL (her words) pension he has - some £60,000, I feel her idea of a little bit and mine are miles apart. She also has, in correspondence I've seen referred to me as the opponent rather than other party or petitioner which appears to me rather an aggressive term and that she is trying to wind him up for a fight.
I'm reading so many horror stories of costs reaching 30/40/50,000 pounds can anyone give me a clue as to what average costs are?
I have suggested to stbx that we should look a working through a consent order as there is plenty of guidance on long marriages with independant children to give us a starting point for negotiation. His solicitor is advising him against this but I think she is acting in her own interests, I have asked my solicitor for advice but he does not reply.
I feel the only leverage I have is his fear of a large bill particularly as he has now asked if I will consider putting off the settlement and Absolute to a later date. He has also suggested that I change my job (I live 150 miles away now)and move back to the FH, he lives with girlfriend elsewhere, as I could pay him rent which would be less than I'm paying now. The FH is jointly owned and financed so I'm guessing that he is finding his new partner and life expensive so his fear of the big bill is probably my best leverage. I haven't got the money to make challenges.

Hello
You are quite right to worry about costs as you say it has allready cost thousands to nisi, if you can both agrea terms you can use D81 and have a consent order done for £149 does that sound better, if you cant agrea and fight it all the way a huge chunk of what you do have to split will be wasted on solicitors.

Final hearing can cost 7-15k alone

So far my divorce has cost less than £600 to nisi, so try your best to agrea, every penny the solicitors get is money you and s2bx wont.