I don't buy fancy things, I do buy the best value for money and am the coupon queen. I work damn hard for my money.

However, I am now left with every bill to the point where I am living on beans and toast. Which is OK for now because I quite like beans on toast...

At the moment I have covered all payments but as the months go on its going to get harder. He preaches to anyone who will listen what a role model father he is and regardless of the facts why won't he give her anything? I haven't even asked for his 'hard earned' cash directly to me. I dont mind if he pays the mortgage and nursery his share direct.

He is 'self employed' with a home improvement company so the CSA would be pointless than usual.

I think I may be stuck?

Hi mel,
you need to give a bit more informations for others to be able to advise you .Go on AR and check Divorce lawyers post.
good luck

Melissa,
Welcome to Wikivorce. Sorry to hear tyou are having a difficult time, but hopefully you will find some common sense answers and support here. It must be heartwrenching to find just 2 years into marriage and with a beautiful daughter that everything has changed.

As far as your husband goes, he has certain LEGAL obligations towards your daughter at the barest of minimums. He is obliged to pay 15% of his nett income to you as child maintenance. Self employed or not, he has a life­style­ that is maintained by his income.

Secondly, as you have started divorce proceedings, you can apply for ancillary relief (Sorting out finances) and Maintenance Pending Suit. This is an interim award of amintenance from him to you until the finances can be fully settled.

You have had a short marriage, so the financial settlement would likely be that you both take out what you individually brought in, and divide up the profits or losses on any assets during the marriage. Of course in dividing up the assets, account must be taken of your daughter and your own respective needs and incomes, such that her housing and living needs are met as the primary consideration.

Stuck? never say never.

Mike

Contact the CSA now. Unfortunately they cannot back date claims so the sooner you contact them the better - you can even do it on line you dont even have to call or write. Get the ball rolling now. My ex is self employed too - doesn't mean they don't have to pay maintenance! Bit tip here - call them regularly and take a note of all conversations and when you called them too. Keep chasing all the time!

Melissa,
I can't add much to what has already been said to be honest and Mike I understand what you are saying when you say ''he has certain LEGAL obligations towards your daughter at the barest of minimums'' But I would say forget about the legal, what about the moral ? Why don't some men want to support there own bloody flesh and blood? There own children, I'm sorry but I just don't understand the mentality of men like this.

And Melissa, If you ever come to a Wiki party please don't sit next to me if your still only eating bean's.

Take care

Phoenix1