Really, I don't want to get divorced but I also don't want to be married to her. She and the kids came back from 9 nights in California and they all looked great. Had a fun vacation and all very happy. I am pleased they had such a good time and it was so good to see the kids. My wife looked great too. Today I was thinking about where we are and how we got here. It all still seems unreal. When I say I don't want to be divorced I mean that I don't want to be separated from my kids. I don't want the pain of getting unmarried. I don't want the financial pain of dividing everything. I don't want

Well below is a copy of an earlier post on the forum. Well what can I say other than I am extremely distraught that I'm here. Its only been 10 days since things started to fall to pieces but outside interference has thrown C4 on the tiny fire and its just got worse. I haven't seen my kids for 10days and spoke to them once quickly and that was that. I've been refused contact of any kind and can't speak to my wife as the police have asked me to stop texting her so I have complied as best i can. Her parents won't even talk amicably with mine and as she has taken the last of my money and

Dear Blog, It's my 3 monthly visit and I am grateful for the chance to get things off my chest. The saying is true, 'Time is a great healer' but it doesn't stop you from feeling 'down' nor feeling like crap. I feel that my whole life is going around in circles and I do not possess the strength nor the courage to do anything about it. I am not going to repeat the 'history' of how and why I find myself in the position that I do - you can read my previous logs for that, but whilst the ex has now been gone for almost 2 years, the shadow that she casts across my life and that