A Step Forward

Well I have already spent an hour writing this blog and lost it somewhere on wiki  and I  thought I had saved it aghhhhhhh.

Ok will try to remember the gist. It was Broken 1 who suggested a blog was a good way of airing things.

As you may all know this has not been the best week for me having had a few emotional outbursts in open chat. One of them was with Dukey who I have always considered a trusted friend as he was the first person to actually respond to a post I made and pm me with his support. I misinterpreted some comments literally which I took as personal at the time

Hi there

Always a first for everyone, and this is my first blog.  I am nearly 44 yrs old, Irish and mother to four beautiful children ranging in age from 5 through to 12 yrs old.  I was 12 years married in September, and friends and family alike were envious of our relationship.  We were the ultimate couple and I loved and trusted him like no other.  In October of last year I was diagnosed with a nasty disease that left me in hospital from beginnning of October through to mid November on plasma dialysis, on both chemo and steroids, and for my sins, I spent eight days in isolation in January. 

I avoided writing a blog when I joined because I don't want my ex to wander into Wiki and read about himself. I'm quite open about myself but divorce isn't just about me...

As I've said in other places, I married at 19 and, 2 children and 7 years later, I divorced my husband because I couldn't live with his violent behaviour. I had felt I was disappearing... afraid to open my mouth, afraid to disagree, afraid to question, afraid of whatever mood he might come home from work in. After every ‘row' (a