Dear blog..

Today i'm sharing a secret with you.. I have a dinner date tomorrow ~massive smiles~ & i'm really nervous, I haven't been out in so many yrs yet alone with another man, other than my stbx. I feel like a teenager going on a first date & i'm sharing my apprehensions with my children & its really strange as i'm sure it's suposed to be the other way around. Ooh I do hope everything goes ok & my nerves don't get the better of me.. In all honesty I really cant wait :-)

My nisi went infront of a judge on the 10th sep :-)

And my daughter (18) returned home last sunday, It's great having her

What weird days these are. I think I am coming out the other end, I woke up this morning and didn't think I want to die, I felt calm. I really did want not to be alive on many days but I kept coming to wiki and peeps always picked me up. Hopefully no panic attacks today either. This improvement can't be the pills yet as they haven't had time to kick in yet. I think the fact I have now been open with the gp about how I feel and taken control has made me feel better. I first thought that I felt better because he was talking about our future and wants to see how things go, but I think it is

Hi wiki peeps

I am leaving wiki for a bit of time things that have happened resently have made me feel like I have to go away for a bit. Those of you I cares so much about know where I am and im still there for you but I just feel that I need to be away from this for a little while. Im sure will be back as I need wiki to be part of my life. I have messed up my life once again and I have to go sort things out. Thank you all for what you have done for me you got me this far. Time to pull up the drawbridge to the tower.

(((((((((((((((big hugs)))))))))))

Ivory X