This is my weekly 'quiet moment'. And in this moment, having read so many posts and so many blogs, it struck me how people with apparent ease slip into new relationships during all this turmoil that is called Divorce. And it made me think more deeply about something that has hovered in the background since seperation.

How does a new relationship form when an old one isnt even dead or buried? Or is that It?....it's been dead for some time?  How does the man or woman who left seemingley so comfortably fit into a new life with another when the bedsheets that were once shared haven't even been

Is it wrong to want to ask my ex new 21yr old girlfiend to babysit for me to go out with a real man? meow yes i know its below the belt, but my ex it 33 im 25 isnt that young enough? grrrr rant over, anyway im meeting her next week for the first time as its been 3 weeks and he has assured me its the real thing its love like hes never know, that to me converts to as much head as he can imagine and her boobs dont move..at all. The thing is im sure shes really nice or really stupid in my opinion but how am i ever going to like this girl? shes done nothing wrong she doesnt want to be my kids

Any advice, legal preferrable as I've had many conflicting opinions on the way to go.

History; ex is self employed and dictated terms of divorce down to who got the coasters! 6 months after 'absolute' given,  moved his partner in [free roof] so that she can provide her kids with her old roof for their own heads ie....to the detriment of providing properly for his own..

agreed to his terms of divorce [we're now 2.5yrs post divorce] and for last 15 months, give or take, he's paid about 25% reduced maintenance and additionally not paying the benefits direct to the kids due under the order due to