Today, or rather yesterday, 8 September, the Decree Nisi was read in court.  I was thinking about it as I sat at home today but it was as if nothing had changed.  There was only a slight hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach.

My STBX came home from work and did not mention a word about the Decree Nisi.  I made no comment.  It was best not to say anything.  Divorce seems to be taken as such a 'normal' thing these days.  People I have known for years (though I don't see many of them anymore) react to the news with mild regret but they are not really saddened as such.  Marriage is not taken

Have just found out that my Decree Nisi is set for early September.  Receiving the solicitor's letter was yet another 'blow' in this long and painful process.  Although I knew the Decree Nisi would come, it still felt like a shock to actually read the words.  The letter said that my husband is entitled to a divorce on the grounds of 'unreasonable behaviour' which, even after 8 months into the process, I find deeply hurtful and ironic.  (In different circumstances, I could have brought a divorce against my husband for unreasonable behaviour that I have tolerated for years.  I could not have

Spent most of today wishing I was part of a family again, my family, and that we could have stopped being horrible to each other, and prevented this mess.

Then I got home and the nisi was on the mat, how did they know?

I'll cry when the kids are in bed.

Not so nisi to see you,