I have just received my solicitor's bill and I have been ignoring the amounting money I owe them and it is more than I thought.  I have had steam coming out of my ears.  Had my ex not been such an intransigent and stubborn(words fail me at this point) person, my bill and his, would be much lower.  After almost spontaneously combusting with rage and a good cry I thought so what?  What price freedom?

 This bill is what is has cost me to be free of this man and it is money well spent.  I have, in effect,  bought my freedom.  I must admit I felt like I had some sort of emotional flu, I felt so

Dear blog

He didn't come in from work until late - was asleep - exhausted so didn't know what time.  This morning he tried to talk to me whilst I washed up mine and georgia's breakfast things but I was just 'yes' or 'no'.

Just as I am walking out the door, he says do you want to talk  - and me stupid stupid instead of saying no I start on one.

I have been so good - all week! what is the matter with me?  He was lying their on the settee looking relaxed and saying can we work this out? and I am like I loved you, I've loved you for 20 years the ball has been in your court, you are still seeing

Hi.

Just wish I could stop feeling so down! I really do seem to take 2 steps forward & 1 step back (if not 2!).

The sun is shining, I've had the day off work, I've kept myself busy, treated myself to a haircut (which I really couldn't afford- not sure I like it yet either- oops), yet I've been walking around like a zombie with tears in my eyes. At the salon where I go to have my hair cut, they give everybody a head massage whilst washing their hair. This simple act of touch left me on the verge of tears. It made me realise how much I miss that tender kind of contact. A massage would