Well after yest morning and was so low, I got up, had bath, did hair and make up, went out to lunch with my daugter, then long walk round Hengistbury Head, then soup kitchen. It did wonders as had no time to think.

But when in the restaurant it was funny. It was mainly couples and family groups. I was watching them. Bar one couple in early 20's not one of the couples was laughing and most weren't even talking to each other. As for the families it was the same, except the parents were talking to the kids, The only peeps laughing were the friends groups. God it reminded me of the past.  

Soup

I broke a trust with my wife....I lied to her.  I did not at anytime be unfaithful to her.  She was and is my only one love.  But about two years ago when this happened, our daughter left for university.  We started moving apart.  I did not give her the attention she needed.  She however reconnected with friends from the past (at least two) on line through facebook.

She developed relationships with them once again.  In all this time she thought I guess from my inattention to her,that I was having an affair with someone at my place of work....completetly missplaced...no way.  I love her too

Oh god.... Yesterday morning I was strong, in control and accepting it was over and then it happened...

 He called in the evening and asked if he could come to the house as the no contact with the kids was not getting sorted any other way. I said I couldnt stop him, so he came.

He spent some time with the boys explaining that he loved them, missed them and wanted to see them. He cried a lot too.

He then came into the lounge to see me and although he wouldnt sit down, we talked. I tried to remain calm and although tearful, I told him that I still loved him and missed him ... I couldnt help it....