I've been feeling a bit tearful today - probably the result of too much wine last night! But I decided today that I had to try and move things on to some kind of conclusion - for my sake and that of the children. So when hubby turned up at the hospital (where our son is a long-term patient until the care package has been put into place), I told him that I want him to set a date when we can talk. And when we talk, he has to know where he wants to go with all this.

The problem is, he's got a great life at the moment - one I wouldn't mind having myself!! He's renting a small flat just round the

Hi everyone, this is my first blog and it took me ages to work out how to do it and with the help of those in chat...here i am.

 It is Wednesday night and I was expecting my husband to come over tonight if he was not working too late.   I have heard nothing from him, wasnt expecting too really.  He is married to his job and works away practically most of the time.   He doesnt even like me to call him now as he says his work doesnt like it, I reminded him that work sees him more than I do and maybe he should mention that he needs to see his wife.  He works from 8am through to about 10 or 11pm

I'm blogging this because I need to lay it all out in front of me to understand why, when I finally got what I asked for, I feel so crap about it...

 My second marriage. Is it easy to remarry? It took me 15 years to do that. Is it easier to separate in a second marriage? I stayed for 3 years more than I knew I needed to because I couldn't face the perception of being a failure. Is it harder to let go of the 'marriage dream' the second time? Don't know. On the one hand, I think 'Been here before, know how it goes...' On the other, I know how valuable that hope is so cling to it all the more