...12.15 and Happy 11 years married!! (together 22).  Feel absolutely awful - 8 months since affair - much back and forth and last several weeks were making a go of if - not living together as he was not ready for that (me neither if truth be told) but seeing each other at weekends - v tense and although nice - obviously something missing (well no kissing etc as neither in mood) - but this situation wasnt working for me - and I felt in danger of it pushing us further apart.

This week was hard for me since today was looming but also felt he was stringing me along re his commitment - even though

My wedding anniversary......

Hi gorgeous Mr Blogman and wiki pals..

im dreading this week...why ?? because its my wedding anniversary friday...

i remember our last one, heaven, lovely dinner, lovely lovely wine....lovely summers even, and lovely restuarant....... 

little did i know a year later, the barsteward would have upped and had an affair..

what am i going to do on friday ?

got the day off wk, simply cant go in, work reminds me of him enough !! let alone on friday !!!

ok, well you know me !! and my love for my car so booked MY H in for MOT 10am...which will take approx 45 mins then hope to go

i dont write blogs normally but just wanted to talk really , excuse the grammar there isnt any  lol ! just so you lot know i`ve  moved out of my family home about a month or so ago and into my flat

i feel so free now perhaps too free im loving my space but miss the structure in my life ! that i suppose is to be expected after 20yrs was the weddding annivesary on the 13th number 20 it would have been !!! was fine wiv that day thought i was going to be morbid  and sad but no quite the opposite so ive excepted that it over !!! phew  another hurdle done

im filing for divorce now and hav the