I'm not really sure how I found myself in this position, nor am I sure of what exactly to write or how to structure my story. One thing I know is that everything I put into this story will be honest and accurate according to the best of my knowledge. I was married for 15 years and my divorce was finalised in January of this year.

I first met my ex-wife when I was 18 years old and she was 16. I was going out with a friend of hers but when she walked into the pub where we were on night I thought 'Wow!'. I thought she was gorgeous. We became good friends and were very close but the relationship

Contact with the children has resumed with my stbx and hence so has the emotional abuse.  After a few weeks of feeling safe with who I am becoming my stbx it still seems has the ability to make me feel worthless.

  At a time when I should be enjoying my children I feel like I felt all the times he told me I was nothing. That I was fat,( he frequently called me Bubbles with reference to the Little Britain character), that I wasn't a good wife or mother and constantly put me down.

This weekend has been hard, really hard. Emotionally I feeled drained, just when I thought I was able to deal with

My story sorry its so long it is just nice to write it down

I decided to divorce my husband on dec the 12th 2007 after trying to explain to him how his use of the internet was destroying our relationship. I am not a prude and would have loved a healthy relationship! But the internet was something which I did not want part of but it seemed to take over his whole life. He downloaded porn all the time and excluded me from having a normal relationship with him.... When I opened my heart to him and cried and  tried to explain how it made me feel, degraded, unloved, dead from the neck down,