Not really looking forward to it. It's been two weeks now and I was hoping for some improvement in the general climate between us.

What I have realised is that by trying to get my wife to talk about us it is causinga dditional stress. And I mean real stress. I think she has enough stress already. So by me trying to sort us out is actually pushing us down.

Well that's my current view. The reason I think this is that when she came back from a few days away with our kids when we talked you could see the flight syndrome kicking in. She was uncomfortable. She said she was getting tightness

Well just need to unburden a few thoughts. Picked up my wife this am at the airport. Lots of smiles as they got into car. Wife did some texting on the motorway. Looked in mirror and her eyes looked tearful. Got home and was talked to like muck.

The day never really picked up. If our daughters were upset then it was my fault 'because they hadn't been like that over last few days, they have been perfect'. I suppose clocks changing, late nights, early morning flight could have had nothing to do with it.

Wife says she feels anxious in my presence and tight across chest. Yet her friend said

My wife returns from a few days away with her best friend whom we have both known for 15 years or more.

I am looking forward to it but have a sickening pit in my stomach that she won't return with a different outlook. But at the same time so hope that she will meet me with a big a hug as when I dropped them off a few days ago.

She hasn't called before leaving the house as I asked so that doesn't reassure me.

Fingers crossed, butterflies in stomach already airborn. I just want to avoid this constant tumble of emotions from despair to (mild) elation.

Must leave soon.

Jules