crossroads

i guess it was bound to happen sooner or later, but when it does it dont make it any easier. You see my STBX and her BF are trying to play happy families with his boys and scott my son, all along so far they have not wanted to be with their dad when she has been around. However that has changed and they will now stay at his place when she is there. Now one of the boys was my sons best friend untill all this happened, but they are in the same class at school and still play with each other, and he has stayed with me on numerous occasions- no problem there. However i am in bloody germany and just recieved an e-mail from the STBX, asking me if i would mind scott staying at his place this weekend, as both his boys will be there and it would be good for them to see each other. You can imagine my potential reaction, but i didn,t get drawn into a slagging match with her. I am begining to hate the way they are trying to create a situation with the boys for there own benefit. I have already discussed this with scott many times and told him if he really wants to go he can, regardless of the pain it will cause me, i have to be stronger than that, But he does not want too, and feels uncomfortable with doing it and sees no reason. How do i tell her that without it seeming like i am making the decision for him? He dislikes the man as much as i do, and in reality has no real reason to stay there. This is the first time she has raised the subject, i dont think it will go away, its just how do you manage these situations.

Ricky