Next week - opposite ends of the spectrum

Wow, next week is going to be such a mix of emotions!

Tuesday, well this determines whether the smiles keep coming for a very long time or not. I believe now, that this is almost a forgone conclusion, but nothing is ever certain in life. But I am as certain as anyone can be that life is going to get a whole lot better. Watch this space!

well at the other end of the spectrum, Wednesday sees me attending court in Norwich 25 miles away for a Contested Interim Contact Hearing, which has been allocated 3 hours. I have to leave all my kids, my 1 year old especially, all day. My friend is lovely, but I will be too far away to come home to my baby if she needs me! I have to take the stand and explain why I won't allow my x2b, the father of my children, to see them without supported contact. Any one that knows my story will know why but I have to justify myself to him and to a judge.

I will meet my barrister shortly before going into court. God it is going to be so hard talking about my children with people that don't know my 5 little darlings. I have to believe that the judge will see sense & order contact through the contact centre, but who knows. Only time will tell.

I have reason to smile, but now again, I have reason to cry. I now know deep down though that I have someone to share my tears with, who will just make it bearable. I have to be strong for my children, and I am just so happy that I have such strength to draw from. I have to believe that I have a life time of happiness to look forward to for myself and the children. That happiness starts right here, right now.

Until Wednesday is here, Tuesday is my focus, happier times ahead!