The Silence is Deafening!!

Ok I know if we did not live in silence we would be shouting at each other, but the silence is deafening!!

So much still needs to be said, to be sorted. Neither one of us can even look at each other without hatred in our eyes let alone hold down more than two words ot each other. The emails have even stopped.

Living in the same home is bearable because the house is big enough to accomadate us all with spare living space and bedrooms. so we do not even have to see each other on day to day tasks. The children are of course in the middle of it all in the family home which to them just appears that mummy and daddy do seperate things as well as sleep in seperate beds.

Ex went to see his solicitor on Tuesday morning which he told me was probably the last time he would ever have to see her to sign, seal and dot all the last of the divorce and financial papers. Since then we have said nothing not even by email, I am now awaiting the proverbial letter to follow from my solictior.

My concern now is Christmas and the pressies for the kids, we will both buy seperatly or can we put our differences aside for just one day and go to the shops and blitz the lot? Your guess is as good as mine.

I am dreading Christmas, the only thing making it worth while is the kids faces with there gifts to open. Goodness know what next year will bring, where we will all be, hopefully still here but who knows.

I am feeling that the unknown is around the corner and will I be able to cope with whatever it holds. Ex appears to non affected by any of this, he just goes about his normal stuff and adgenda, appears to eat and sleep as normal. Me on the other hand have no consistency to a sleep pattern anymore and my appitite is well out of the window these days. Inside I feel an emotional wreck but on the outside I hide it well according to associates however friends and family know me too well.

 God wil it ever get any better??