It hit me today - like a ton of bricks!

After seeing the financial advisor yesterday to see if I can afford to buy stbx out and then trawling through loads of paperwork etc, I overslept this morning and when I did wake up my first thought was - my god, he's left me. That was it, I could hardly even get out of bed. I phoned work made an excuse about upset tum but I forced myself to get dressed and go to work, even though we work for the same company and I knew it meant I would see him. I cried all the way to work, not so much about him but more for everything else that is encompassed in the ripple effect that has turned my entire world upside down. Once I was at work, my colleagues went out of their way to cheer me up and by this afternoon I was laughing and joking with them. Then I saw him inspect our (my) car and I felt this overwhelming urge to punch him right in the face - I didn't but it really helped me to get it into perspective. He has gone, he's not coming back (wouldn't have him anyway) and I will get through this, I have family and friends that love me - he has nobody apart from the fat slug!