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Oct 30
2007
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update...Posted by chris_34_dad in my day today, moving on |
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(had to blog 'cuz wiki wouldn't let me add this comment after Andrew's and Fatboy's comments...odd)
I'm not sure what the overall effect will be, nor am I a professional, but so far, it seems to have gotten under her skin.
As I didn't call her back last night, she sent me a txt message as early as 7:15 a.m. this morning - "I left 2 messages last night. Call me when you can."
I didn't call. At about 8:00 a.m., I sent a very impersonal e-mail: "Son is fine. Has a cough. Won't see you tomorrow or this weekend-no big deal. Your mother will be visiting tonight and tomorrow."
No salutation or loving comment. Simply my work signature that's embedded in e-mail.
She called at 8:30 and I did not answer. Left a long voicemail about needing to talk about some travel, and whatnot. And then ended with a "call me if you want to. I'll be on my cell at work." I didn't return her call.
She sent yet another e-mail at about 9:00 a.m., asking "What is my mother coming over for?" My reply was blunt: To spend Halloween with her grandson.
I'm keeping my comments short, vague, and as impersonal as possible. I don't think I'll answer her calls at all this week. I will communicate with her regarding our son's well being, as if she was to get a report from a pediatrician.
Not sure how this will all go, but she's made it clear that there is nothing left to discuss about "us".
I'm not sure what the overall effect will be, nor am I a professional, but so far, it seems to have gotten under her skin.
As I didn't call her back last night, she sent me a txt message as early as 7:15 a.m. this morning - "I left 2 messages last night. Call me when you can."
I didn't call. At about 8:00 a.m., I sent a very impersonal e-mail: "Son is fine. Has a cough. Won't see you tomorrow or this weekend-no big deal. Your mother will be visiting tonight and tomorrow."
No salutation or loving comment. Simply my work signature that's embedded in e-mail.
She called at 8:30 and I did not answer. Left a long voicemail about needing to talk about some travel, and whatnot. And then ended with a "call me if you want to. I'll be on my cell at work." I didn't return her call.
She sent yet another e-mail at about 9:00 a.m., asking "What is my mother coming over for?" My reply was blunt: To spend Halloween with her grandson.
I'm keeping my comments short, vague, and as impersonal as possible. I don't think I'll answer her calls at all this week. I will communicate with her regarding our son's well being, as if she was to get a report from a pediatrician.
Not sure how this will all go, but she's made it clear that there is nothing left to discuss about "us".
Comments (2)
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Fat Boy Getting Slimmer
said:
| October 30, 2007 | ||
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Just be careful you don't do it just for the fun of turning the tables. It has probably made her aware that she needs to do a fair part of the comms rather than having it delivered to her on a plate. Start to think of a strategy for changing it a little so that it doesn't develop into full-blown powerplay and then it may lead to a more equal communication. It all depends on what you want to achieve at the end of the day. You have always seemed to keep very calm and reasonable so I'm sure you will have started to plan out next few days. The great thing is that you have altered the balance of power a bit which has got to be good. |
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LittleNix
said:
| October 30, 2007 | ||
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Chris, having spoken to you about this I am really glad that you have been able to shift some of the 'power play' in your direction. I agree with FB that you musn't let it get to a 'tit-for-tat' stage, but well done for being strong!  |
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