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Apr 01
2009
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wow that seems like a heavy title but the truth is it is setting in.i know baby steps but here is the deal.signned the 2nd set of papers today,sbtx wants me out by may first,unemployed,new mortgage that i should have never taken on but have enough cash to float it until the end of the summer but...reality is setting in.and just need to get it off my chest.here i sit again on the computer but at least i did get some day work today and it felt good even for a couple of hours to be active.been living on the pity pot.in may i will leave to go to my new "seasonal home"water will be turnned on but the problem is if the house we own together does not sell soon i am going to be up the creek without the paddle so to speak.i really have no one to turn to to help bail me out nor do i expect anyone to i may ask a couple of friends for a personal loan to be payed back when the house does sell but you know how that goes friends and money so are not your friends anymore but if worse(if it can get any worse)comes to worse i will have to do that.my dad rest his soul used to say hindsight is better than foresight but now i wish i was not so foolish as to get myself in over my head,my life sucks now and i just may have to sell my future if something does not happen soon financially speaking that is.the economy sucks,nobody is buying houses now i am just digging myself into a bigger dark hole,and no where to turn expcept here so bear with me and if this sounds like rambling on..it is.i was alaways told to keep on the brighter side of life snf even if you hsd the world crumbling down sround you at least do not let on"everything is good,i am o k ,not worried,etc etc,well i am getting to worring way to much:a breakdown i guess i am going through but am i just letting this happen?so i can be a complete failure,way in over my head,failed marriage,lost my dream job(my fault,another story) the last straw will be leaving our(mine)dog with the ex he has been my lifeline but how can i even take care of him if i have no visable means ..i just do not know but i am starting to panic...boy this feels great just getting it out.thanks ...april fools day and am i the fool to think that everything will work out?????i guess in the long run i hope i can look back and laugh but for now life sucks....
Comments (2)
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79firstwhen
said:
| April 01, 2009 | ||
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Hindsight dale - and when you look back and laugh, Wiki peeps will be there to see your happiness......Stay positive xx | |
smurfy1973
said:
| April 01, 2009 | ||
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Life may suck right now but hopefully (I cling to any hope at this stage) things will get better. You are not a failure, remember that. You are not a fool. You are a human being. Look after yourself and keep trying to take those baby steps, hard I know but try. We are here for you. We understand. Take care and best wishes x and a big hug (((((u)))) |
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