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Feb 21
2009
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Strange dayPosted by David2109 in self improvement, positive thinking, feeling down |
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Woke up feeling quite positive this morning, planned on getting a lot done around the house. Managed to achieve most of what I'd planned this morning, and a session in the gym also helped take my mind off things.
Saw my wife yesterday evening when she dropped our daughter off - that was a strange conversation. As she came into the house, she offered me her car keys for me to reattach her key ring to the keys as her car had been at the garage all day. I used a sharp knife to open up the keyring to put the keys back on, and was surprised when she stood behind me and expressed concern over it being a dangerous way to do things. I just smiled. We then talked about the children for ten minutes before she left.
She called within 10 minutes of leaving to say that she would like to come to our eldest's Options Evening on Tuesday, and that she would meet me there. Not sure I handled all of the contact well, but not sure how I should deal with her anymore without having accusations of being false if I'm too pleasant.
She's just taken our daughter to stay at her house this evening, so I'm left with the lads. Very strained tonight - I have absolutely no idea what's going through her mind.
No letters or emails from solicitors yet, so despite having a week off work, that side of things doesn't look to have moved forward at all. What is it she wants - a quick divorce has progressed to the slowest most painful death by a thousand cuts - if divorce is what she wants, why doesn't she progress it all. Maybe then we can overcome the stifled conversations and possibly even be friends again? I want that more than anything, but the way things are at the moment I don't know if it's possible. Then again, we've had more difficult times over the last three months, so who knows.
She still seems like a total stranger, as though I've never held her, kissed her.
"I suffocate I breathe in dirt and nowhere shines but desolate
and drab the hours all spent on killing time again
all waiting for the rain"
("Prayers For Rain" - The Cure)
I was feeling calm earlier, content even, sitting in the sunshine in my bedroom, reading - I see her and all of my positivity and calmness vanishes.
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Claymic78
said:
| February 21, 2009 | ||
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David you are going to need to be patient when it comes to the divorce stuff. it all takes time. yes you would like it to just be over and done with, but there will always be some delays. we had no kids, no finances to sort out and still it took 7 months and delays from the courts bla bla bla.... unfortunately it is a long journey, but it will end. i think for now you should not look at being friends. it is hard. right now just try and be civil towards each other - if nothing else for the kids and to try and have smooth proceedings. im glad u had plans you stuck with today. structure is good when all around you and inside of you is chaotic. and hang on to the times of calm. at present there is alot of anger which needs to be felt but can also be managed. i hope tomorrow u have a better day take care claudette |
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tiffany
said:
| February 23, 2009 | ||
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I seem to be in the same place as you right now and therefore don't have the answers or sensible advice of others, but I do understand. | |
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