At work today I passed the Staff Counceller in the corridor..who immediately grasped my hand and asked.."How are you doing"..with a huge smile I replied.."I'm doing ok"...then she gave me that look..head down, eyes up into mine peircing my inner sanctum.."No really I am"..so she let me go and I scurried off like a naughty child with a huge secret..But the truth is...I am ok..better than I was..just battling work and home, battling the childrens tantrums, battling this huge tiredness that weighs heavy on my shoulders, not knowing where life is taking me, not knowing what the next year holds

Having lost my password for this site again, I decided to say goodbye, but hey I'm back by some fluke. I started out as Sals 44 re-invented myself as Sals45 and managed to come home again.

So much has changed, glad to see some old faces, sad to see so many new..

Getting to the first anniversary of my separation. June 16^th.

The days seem longer but the years rush by..thanks Dot Cotton for that quote.

Last May we were on a trip to France strimming a ¼ acre of meadow. This May I returned on my own to our dream house to say goodbye to what was our future as a family with his voice ringing in my

Feeling a little lost in my busy world.

Got to work today as usual and had a guilty pang..wondering if the youngest had managed to get herself up for school, so had to switch off Mum mode and put my working girls hat on. It's a matter of trust, I have to trust that the girls will manage without me and learn that we just have to do what we have to do, but I had a moment of anger..wondering what X2B was up to..while I work and worry.

I had a momentary lapse of preserving my decoram as a professional and retreated to the fact that I was a newly made single woman and asked a colleague.."when should