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Sep 23
2008
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I don't know how I am at present. Tearful. Feeling quite alone I think. Not quite the same as lonely; lots of friends about me, but no-one to really share the burdens. How I miss my dad!
Yesterday I couldn't break through the feeling of being completely overwhelmed, sitting amidst the washing and dirty dishes, the house in a tip. I was lucky that a friend popped in and gathered me up for an afternoon of tackling the gardening together or things would be even worse.
I hate my life. I don't want anything any more. Don't care about the money. It is all worthless. I am fed up with being strong, thinking positive and putting a brave face on it all. I just want to put my hands up and surrender.
This is not like me at all: I am such a determined and optimistic person. I know this feeling won't last...2 days ago I was fine....but I am tired of the unremitting climb out of this black hole.
finding
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mike62
said:
| September 23, 2008 | ||
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findingmyself, It is that bloomin emotional roller coaster that everyone bangs on about. Its a killer. But it does slow down from time to time. Yes, would be great to think that we can wave a magic wand and make it all alright, but hey - don't work that way. It takes time and the will to find a better place to be. You can do it. You know you can. Not easy, but not impossible. Take care, Mike |
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fade2gray
said:
| September 23, 2008 | ||
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Hi... Even the best and most reliable cars do run out of petrol sometimes.... You have supportive friends...have sorted out your garden out today. Put some happy music on tomorrow and you may very well find you have a full tank of petrol again x |
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Poppie
said:
| September 24, 2008 | ||
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Finding, (((((((((((((((big hug)))))))))))))) These days do get less and less but even now I still have days like this. What I have come to realise is that what I feel is natural and that tomorrow I will feel different. Accepting that things will never be as they were is so difficult but none of us know what the future holds so we have to have hope at least. I feel I am on a journey that I did not choose to take and I am not sure where I am heading, just hoping it takes me to a better place. Love Poppie xx |
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