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Aug 10
2007
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The Bed's Too Big Without YouPosted by divwiki in Untagged |
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Ever since my x2b told me she wanted a divorce I haven't been able to sleep in bed and have slept on the couch leaving the bed stripped bare like some sort of artistic expression of our relationship.
The dog's a bit narked that he is now off the couch at night (except when I'm blogging) and has to sleep in HIS bed on the floor, which he always thought was an ornament.
The other night I dreamt I was looking at a fully made-up bed again, but this one was a single. I can't decide if that was a hopeful prophecy or a woeful one.
Tonight I got things a bit more in perspective. My Mum has an eye problem and the hospital had discharged her. I had been nagging her to go to a proper opticians and she decided, guess what, to go to the opticians - Mum's know best! The optician was very concerned and got her an emergency eye clinic that evening at a hospital some way off. I was free so I took her there and we hung around for four hours; justas well, she has high blood-pressure and a suspected blood-clot behind the eye. She's also awaiting results of her cholesterol test. At least now they can do something about it.
I got home and found 21 messages on my answerphone, not all my x2b but she clearly still expects me to be at her beck and call. She said that when she didn't get a response she was considering coming over to check on the dog! I'm not sure I want a partially divorced woman barging in on me just because I don't answer the phone...
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fio
said:
| August 11, 2007 | ||
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I have a friend struggling with radio therepy at the moment. It certainly puts relationship problems into perspective. When it comes down to it its difficult but not life and death. You know that time will make this better. Get back into that bed before you put your back out! And think of the dog! I'm still sharing a bed with my other half, balancing on the edge! | |
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divwiki
said:
| August 11, 2007 | ||
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I bet that makes you feel on edge in every sense. I was watching that Salsa class film late last night and two of the characters were sharing a rapidly subsiding house as they divorced, you could cut the tension with a knife. Is it like that for you two? | |
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Shelia
said:
| August 11, 2007 | ||
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I am aggrieved for you. You are a human being and she was not concerned for you but for the dog? You are worth more than this. Why are you taking the dog's place on the couch? Fio is right get into bed. Go back and claim your own space in your own bed. Either sleep in the middle or place a pillow down one side where she used to lie. I find the pillow down the side works well for me after more years of marriage than I care to admit to. I have a name for my pillow which is probably daft, but I also talk to my plant which I brought with me from the marital home and has grown to the point where I have had to repot it. It is the only other living thing in my house after ousting the tribe of strange species of spiders that had been squatting. Buy some new bedding and sleep like a king. It is time to care for yourself instead of her. Old habits may die hard but so what? You take care. Shelia |
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divwiki
said:
| August 12, 2007 | ||
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Sorry guys, I didn't make it clear. She has moved out, I just can't bring myself to sleep in the marital bed without her - unresolved feelings and all that. Don't worry, the dog thinks it's just as bizarre! | |
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divwiki
said:
| August 12, 2007 | ||
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Sorry Sheila, I've just re-read your message and now I get it ( reading this at 5.45am, that's my excuse!) Good points from both of you, thanks for your support. |
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sals44
said:
| August 13, 2007 | ||
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Hi, Your blog strung a cord, When my hubby left he took our two bull mastiffs who also shared our marital bed...left me and the kids but hey ho! I spent the whole weekend stripping the room clean...hoovering for hours....moving it around and now I sleep in it like a princess. Reclaim that room as your own, and become a Prince again. |
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divwiki
said:
| August 13, 2007 | ||
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Hi Sals, thanks. I'm all out of white chargers, what's wrong with just being a friendly and reliable squire? Sounds like your manic clear-up helped. My x2b keeps coming back in and moving things around again. Council say she has every right until she gives notice to quit the tenancy. Castle for rent! |
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