|
Aug 26
2008
|
 |
I've absolutely no idea what I'm doing, or if anybody will either read or be interested in my blog, but sometimes in life one needs a place to scream - and I'm hoping this'll turn out to be the place for me to do it.
If this blog continues, I'm reckoning that things will kinda start slotting themselves into place, a sort of "self Counselling" service. So here goes, and sorry to any readers for any future ramblings!!
I need to talk about it, the whole story - about the crap childhood that led me into a crap marriage that I'm desperate to escape from. But I've no idea if this is the place to do it, but it's better than nowt!
My bestest mate in the world says - "...so when is Andrew going to allow himself a life?". Problem is that the kids mean the world to me, and I absolutely refuse not to be a full time Dad to them. I helped bring them into the world, and (call me old fashioned) I intend on seeing this Dad thing through. All kids need a father figure. I did desperately when mine buggered off at theage of 15, and I ain't doing to mine what my Dad did to me.
But at what cost to myself? That's what my mate is on about. Do I deserve a life? We'll, yes I do. But they didn't ask to be brought into the world, and the fact that their Mother is a devious, arguementative, unreasonable, aggressive lying spend-thrift is hardly their fault, and so rather than leave them with that, I guess that I'm far better off convincing myself that all is well in my life, and carry on running my business as well as taking care of their needs.
...oh, I'm sorry, didn't I mention that I cook, do the school runs, do the sandwithches, wash and wipe, do the food shopping (plus lots, lots more) at the same time as run the business?
Perhaps I'm just being harsh. Surely she can't be that bad? Perhaps it's just my imagination the in 1999-2000 she helped herself to over £20,000 of our savings which lead me into bankruptcy - or maybe I just imagined that, since 2000 I've had my own bank account, and she's simply carried on her spend-thriftedness by herself, and now had to go bankrupt herself for over £30,000?
No, I don't think I've imagined it, it really did happen. And yes, we're buggered, the lot of us. There are no savings, no owned home, no future.
Still, musn't grumble eh?
There's chors to do and a business to run - and most importantly, the most important job of all, being a Dad to the kids.
Ahh, life is grand, isn't it?
Show/Hide comments
Poppie
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
Hi Drew Welcome to wiki, blogging will help you so keep it going, it was nice that your ventured into chat this morning so remember to come back. As you say the most important job is to be there for the kids and that is what you are doing but you also need to take care of yourself and yes you do deserve a life, we all do, we only come this way once. Poppie |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
fitbird
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
Hi Drew, big hug sent as you need one. It is a tough time for you, realisation that you spouse is behaving badly is hard, ad then you realise you have to do something about it and yeah Drew i agree with your pal - so when are you going to alow yourself a life? You deserve a life, seek some legal advice just to see what is what. Have you been to relate? Keep blogging it is great self therapy xxx | |
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Goodman01
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
Drew, This could be me, all the way down to your name, I left my ex in May 2007 for the same reasons, and the only reason I lasted that long was couldn?t/cant stand the thought of not living with my children, you can leave and maintain a relationship with them, I cant say what the long term effects are, but I do know my children know who their dad is! Financially, I am now stable, and I have a chance at happiness, my mates used the same phrase with me. In my experience Relate was a waste of time, she was, what she was, and what she was, was not for me! Good luck GM |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Daisy040
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
Hi Drew welcome to wiki, everyones here for you....so continue to blog away...see the mesgs you've had already...someone somewhere here on wiki will probably be in a similar situ to you... take care and good luck...lifes crap at the moment but it can and will get better.... Daisy xxx |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
jude6168
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
Hi drew I would like to add my welcome to wiki and say you came to the right place hun. Keep bloging we are here to listen and support. You are having a terrible time at the moment and it helps to let it out. We know where you?re coming from and know the pain and emotional instability that goes with all this. Be kind to yourself and hope to talk with you in chat sometime. ((((((((((((((((((((big hugs))))))))))))))))) Jude x PS you grumble if you like!!!!!!!!! |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
marriaa
said:
| August 26, 2008 | ||
 |
drew,welcome to wiki, I am sure getting things of your chest is going to help. I am sorry that you are going through a tough time. "Better coming from a broken hame than living in one" I am sure that your children will be better off without your wife. Why do you think that you are the one who has to be the absent parent?? The way it sounds ,your wife will willingly let you have custody of the children.You are doing the caring already so why don't you apply for full custody,you will do a better job byself and be a better role model for your children I admire you for putting the children first,but you might have to review your approach. good luck |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Show/Hide comment form
