|
Aug 18
2008
|
 |
Wow, totally winded now. How thnigs can change in a few hours. He texted a few times and then rang. Ooops he changed his mind again. No reconciliation, just friendship and sex on offer. Actually forced him to talk about barmaid and he now say they friends, mentioned re' all his friends thought they were a couple, he denied it again. He is feeling hard done by as he says it's alright for us women as we keep the family home, kids etc etc but the poor blokes lose everything. AWWWWWWW someone pass him a tissue. He said he would have to find someone with a home as he hasn't got one of his own now, watch out single women.
But fed up with his yo yo ways. He is hanging me on a bit of string, he says wait and be patient as he may see the light and ask me out to dinner...................oh god I nearly choked..............hence title..........share the ammo please. Ok so sobbed for quite a bit as really thought he was changing but all he did was slate me and say it was all my fault. He also said he wanted more kids and I wouldn't - I tried again to point out that as I brought them up single handed as he was either away fishing all weekend, or playing golf or in pub there was not a hope in hell I would have had more. He said a few mths back he was ready to be a dad now!!!!!! He didn't do swimming, school plays, sports days......................
So back to rejection and desolation again, it's like he wants it all but doesn't want me to move on. He was trying to warn me off single men as most of his mates are single and he knows that they are like - just shag you Claire and then leave you!! Yeah like I am going to ever be interested in anyone like his mates. I want a brain in a man!!
So have now realised that he blames me for everything, god how nasty of me, there was me at home trying to make relate work and I was so horrid I forced him to run off with the barmaid............. AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!....... Is this bloke for real?????? My brain is telling me lucky escape and thank god I only wasted 19 yrs not more but my heart is still so broken I just don't know what to do. I now love him but also totally want to smash his face in in anger and disbelief.
xxx
P.S. One hour on he is texting saying as I said no to sex does that mean I won't be seeing him on his 40th in 2 weeks and he has to make new plans. I said no I'll still see him, dippy cow here still hoping. You never know the champagne picnic on his 40th might trigger something - why of why of why do i keep hoping for this loser??????
Show/Hide comments
buxtonman
said:
| August 18, 2008 | ||
 |
Hi Claire Yes, this constant reeling us back in is really damaging. Only you know when it is time to force him to stop it. We both know how hard it is to clutch at anything that resembles hope don't we? My take on this now as as follows! My ex knows she could have me back right now if she wanted...at least she thinks she can....so all she needs to say is "sorry, I've done awful things, please move back in with me". But they don't say that that do they! What they actually do is throw a tiny morsel of hope just to keep you in their power without actually having to commit to anything. I am going to London as I said in my blog. My ex probably could stop me if she tried REALLY hard but I know with 100% certainty that she won't. She will say something like "Well, we'll never have a chance anyway if you are in london" which is just another dangling trick. This time i won't fall for those mind games which ALWAYS lead me into trouble. Andy |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Petrof
said:
| August 18, 2008 | ||
 |
You have started to really see through him now what he is really like. Once I have realised that about my ex, I have realised I don't love him anymore and I don't like him anymore either. He is a different person from the one that I thought I was married to. You said you love him but maybe you also love the person you thought he was rather than the person he is. I share your sentiment "My brain is telling me lucky escape and thank god I only wasted 19 yrs not more ". He is feeling quitly and is trying to project his feelings on you and make you feel bad and guilty as well. He might be trying to make you feel sorry for him so that he can control you again. Don't fall for it. I feel for it big way and now I wish I did not. From what he says to you it looks that he is lost and has no idea what to do, what he wants, where to go.... It might be quite nice to just sit back and watch him struggling with the consequences of his actions. Petrof |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Mockingbird
said:
| August 18, 2008 | ||
|
Oh God Fitbird - the more I read of people's blogs the more I realise how we all go through very similar stuff - and yet we all think our problem is unique - that only we know our other half and know if they are leading on us on etc - but yet from blogs it seems like we are all married to the same person!!! All I can say is I have had months of my H back and forward - giving me hope and me letting him - for him yesterday (today anniversary) to say he didnt want us anymore - did not want to try (its been me trying - hes just enjoyed the single life) and couldnt see himself being happy being married to me!! But yet - I still would work at it if he changed his mind - how mad is that. So what you are going through is not new and all I can say is protect yourself - yes have hope (I'm not sure when that goes - I still have it!!!) but be realistic and dont let him use you. LOL |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Bloddy
said:
| August 18, 2008 | ||
|
Hi fitbird Thanks for your kind words earlier. Not much advice I'm afraid but try to stay strong - you seem to have a lot of compassion for others so try to be kind to yourself too Blod |
|
| Votes: +0 |
report abuse
vote down
vote up
|
Show/Hide comment form
