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Aug 16
2008
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Or should i say why cant i die?
sorry if i sound so low, but im having an awful time at the moment. The reason i cant die is because of my kids,they have got a crappy mother, who doesnt give a sh.t about them,so therefore i have to be strong for them. trouble is i dont want to be strong any more,i have had enough, even after having had a heart attack, my so called family and friends still dont care enough to ring, just to see if im alright,so i have to carry on on my own. this is my only outlet, i do try going onto the forums,but i have no confidence,so i watch for a few minutes,then just leave,feeling even worse, i know what your all going to say, you have to make the effort,join in, say somethink, but i just cant, ive been let down so many times,theres just no hope. i hate my lifesolong im trapped by my own kids,its not there fault, and i dont make them aware how i feel, its so hard being on my own, i cant take it anymore, ive had all i can take, but my youngest is only 12, so i have to carry on, i have to be there for them, i just dont want to. i know there are people out there who have some problems that are far worse than mine,but it doesnt help, i read some of the other blogs,and i say to myself,im ok im not going through the sh.t their going through,but they all seem to have friends to talk to,i would take all their problems onto my shoulders for just one friend,but it doesnt work like that.so here i sit bleating on to all of you lot,i dont know why.please dont feel bad for me,you have enough on your plate,be strong for yourselves,take courage to improve your own life,my life is over, i can only wait till my kids are old enough to take care of themselves,then i shall be free,free to end the hell that i have to endure.dont be sad for me,because then i will be free of all this pain im in,and i will look back and hopefully see my kids strong in their ways and i will be happy x
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spooky
said:
| August 16, 2008 | ||
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Please go and see your GP on monday.......................you need some help with these feelings. I will not give you glib answers or tell you to pull yourself together...we have all felt like this at one time or another!! Take care xx |
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megan
said:
| August 16, 2008 | ||
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Hi lifesl My kids are 26 and 28 and when my stbx left I felt like you. I mentioned to my daughter how down I felt and she, always the sensible one told me "I've got one tosser for a parent (her father) I don't need two". That stuck with me. You will get over divorce, your children would never get over you taking your own life as they would always feel responsible. Yes divorce is sh.t but we will get over it, if only we new WHEN !!!!!!!!!! |
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findingmyself
said:
| August 16, 2008 | ||
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You sound exhausted and overwhelmed and in a very dark place right now. Agree wth spooky, please go to your GP and get some help. | |
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ruby66
said:
| August 16, 2008 | ||
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i know how you feel but you must see a doctor.i feel like you but i went to see my gp and im getting help.i am sorry you are in so much pain suicide is not the answer hang on in there for your kids sake | |
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fitbird
said:
| August 17, 2008 | ||
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Stay in chat and keep blogging, I was there a month ago, I really wanted to die, the peeps here saw me through it. They won't let you down here as they know how you feel. Go see your gp, talk it through, log on here when you can. xxx | |
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mishmine
said:
| August 17, 2008 | ||
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hey life, pop in chat and have a quiet chat with just one of us privately. u dont have to join in til u r ready. u wont feel so alone, we are real peeps u know, and we make good friends, and hopefully longlasting friendshipt will come out of this. i too had no one but my kids, now from wiki i have loads of mates. its not a big effort. just come in, and at the very least if im there will be happy to talk. im there a lot  (((((((((((life))))))))))) mish xx |
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fish6
said:
| August 17, 2008 | ||
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hey life benn there still there on rare occations but you,ve already got the most important focus ...your kids ive got 1 15yr old which constantly keeps me going whether im with her or not stay strong life there is more than what youare going through and i found the doctors areal help i know trust is a word that is hard at the moment but try pls its worth it !!!! take care .....kev (fish6) |
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