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Aug 16
2008
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Ok went out, nothing to do but thought go into town to mooch. I am losing it, every woman I see I wonder is that her? If she is walking around with a young teen girl I almost stop and try and hear if they refer to any names? The barmaid has 13yr old daughter (I know tart and tarts daughters names). Please tell me other have felt like this and I am not going fruit loop. I just need to know what she looks like, who she is, what she is.
Idiot texted me, I am obviouslly in bad mood, see above paragraph, so gave him the f**k off text back (more words but same message). Wanting him to crawl and grovel and apologise and be nice but he now ignoring me, so back to feeling tearful as well as a fruit loop.
Roll on 6pm then I can have glass wine, chain smoke and feel wretched (kids out for night) and wallow in self pity as have no life. Which I know I do but it just doesn't feel like it today, nah lying, have next to no life.
Back to wanting to stab her, even though he was prob more at fault. Have planned millions of times over what I am going to say to her if i get to meet her. God this is so unhealthy, just have to hang on 6 weeks and start excellent new job which i am excited about then i won't have time to be alone in my own head space as that is quite dangerous.
xxx
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megan
said:
| August 16, 2008 | ||
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Yes I've been there. Sometimes I still am, but being in your head is the worst place to be. I keep busy so I don't have to much thinking time. Go swimming or for a run. Meet up with a friend. Good luck in the new job and look Forward and never back. Good luck |
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