Today my doc signed me off work for 2 weeks - just a viral thing but I work in a hospital. So, I have decided to use the time to get the house organised etc for going on the market, as soon as I feel up to it. Thanks to all the kind people on here who commented and sent me messsages, I don't feel quite so scared/guilty, am trying to look forward positively, past the worst bit (are you convinced?) and it's so good to be able to talk about some of these things. A couple of really helpful suggestions from the comments - so thanks again, all of you!

Just joined here today, my divorce seems to be going on forever and a day and its really getting me down.

My husband walked out on me and our 2yr old son last march, he phoned me up in his lunchbreak and told me it was over and wouldnt even come home (he owns his own business) and discuss it.  We hadnt the most happiest of marriages as our child tended to take up all of our time and at the time he left my son was suffering with a bad chest infection (he has asthma) which wouldnt clear, we were taking it in turns to stay up all night with our son.

To cut a long story short I filed for divorce

It isn't always easy to meet the expectations  others have of how much I should be doing by now. Even my expectations of myself which for so long have been just to get through the day are beginning to scare me.  Having no job is a problem as I don't feel focused and motivated. As the loss of my job was as a result of not coping with the breakdown of my relationship and the many complications of the affair being linked with my colleague, it's all crumbled and I don't know how to put it together again. I truly am trying to get contracts. It's so difficult when you're free- lance and responsible