Not such a good day today really. Since this first started, stress has been a major factor in my life. The stress of the break-up itself, trying to help the kids deal with their grief and pain, trying to deal with my own emotions, sorting out the finances, my own bank account, changing the bills, moving house, dealing with how quickly he's moved on (just over a week) after being together for 10 years, the list is endless. My own boss suggested I get the docs to sign me off work for a bit because of stress. Of course it was natural, with all this stress, that I didn't feel well, no one could

My emotions are up and down at the moment. One minute I feel positive about court tomorrow after seeing my solicitor yesterday and then the unpredicatability of my ex husband throws my thoughts into turmoil again.

He has played the mind games with me over the last few weeks in the build up to court. He served me with his sworn affidavit on Friday when he collected the children for contact, instead of serving my solicitor; all done for maximun effect being the weekend.

He has stated that I included a C1A which I didn't but I even doubted that and went to the court to check. There is certainly no

I am so confused now.I just need to blog this to get it out of my head, if that makes sense. Just general running order of events. no timescale.

I always supported him when he was working for himself. Even when it didn't work out & we had to remortgage to survive it was ok cos we had each other. We never had money for luxuries, sometimes not even essentials, but our relationship was strong. Even when he worked away we trusted each other. Actually now I am reflecting maybe I shouldn't have been so trusting about that.  DON'T GO THERE.

Planning for the future & hoping to have something to pass