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May 20
2008
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They tell me that the day you decide to divorce is the first day of the rest of your life - wrong, wrong, wrong and when it comes im going to celebrate with bells whistles fireworks and champagne. To say I have been waiting for 'the' day for sometime is an understatement, I have been waiting for it since Aug 30th 2006 - why this date, because this is the date i caught my husband with my friend in my mothers garden!! and the slope started and it was meant to go up but since in reality its gone down and down and i've even hit a few milestones since then,
first off losing a few friends (since catagorised as 'my friends' not 'his friends'
then the trying to make a go of it
then the months of being so bloody miserable nothing mattered and i didn't do anything!!!
then saw a solicitor for first time, just for advice don't you know, i was never going to actually do anything.
then a marriage councellor - i suppose this should have told me there never was going to be a change - it takes two to want to make a marriage work and going on my own was never going to cut it
the crappy christmas
the even crappier significant birthday party - this was the clincher or rather one of them as there was two - I phoned round 'our' friends and suddenly they had lots of excuses, didn't know what they were doing then or they were busy, one or two even said they had other appointments - so my significant birthday party was a complete dead loss - this i will never forgive him for
and the final clincher - a visit from my dad and aunt, for some reason the day before they were due to leave he sent me a text saying he was going to divorce me - ahhhhhh the releif -
As it turned out my solicitor preferred it the other way around and now i'm divorcing him - so much for amicable its started off ok and then he started having hissy fits - I just want it over and done with but my family is already torn asunder, with subterfuge after subterfuge going on, so much so i 'sacked' my mother in law from her childcare duties with regard to my youngest child - I just couldn't trust her and now back to the waiting, the waiting for 'the day' because as far as i can see I have many more months of turmoil ahead of me and i often hear from ppl 'this time next year it will be better' Will it??
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mrsnomore
said:
| May 21, 2008 | ||
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I hope so DD, your story sounds a bit like mine.... and I haven't even started the Divorce yet!  The best revenge is to get on with your life LOVING every minute of not having to put up with a half assed partner...  All the crap that surrounds it is horrible, family friends etc the impact is huge - BUT it DOES show you who your real friends are and shows you how its not you but him. His loss! This time next year Rodney - that got me through six months of hell, its still bad for me but I try not to concentrate on the end of the divorce being the answer just focus on getting on with you and preventing him from affecting you anymore... (this is the diet I am on!) Big hugs |
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marriaa
said:
| May 21, 2008 | ||
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well you did give it a try,unfortunately it did not work,how were you suppose to know.Now that the ball is rolling there is no stopping till the end which I hope is not too far for you.My journey has just began too,I can see the slope coming but it cannot go on for ever. be courageous every day is another day nearr the end good luck |
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BatteredDad
said:
| May 22, 2008 | ||
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Hi Untagged I have also been waiting a long time i found out about my wifes affair 16th July 06. So i do know how you feel. My ex wife ran off with this man and now denies living with him. I have the 2 kids with me. Thats my reward,to see them all the time and i'm in their life full time. 've got my FDR in 10 days and spent £15k on solicitors and i can't wait til its over and done with. Best of Luck DAD |
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