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Apr 30
2008
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Feeling lowPosted by starry_eyes in breaking up, anger hate revenge |
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I thought i had been doing so well, and as they say time is the greatest healer, but today something just snapped and i feel so angry and low. There was this stupid driver on the road, and cut a long story short we had words, when i got home i just felt so down. All the feelings and bottled up for such a long time surfaced, i thought of my ex, what a sh*thead he was, how he was merrily getting on with his life with his new woman, and seeing the kids whenever he wanted to, having the best of both of everything, then he still has the audacity to call me names for no reason, when it was he who left and he who made a mockery of our marriage.
Heres me, seemingly coping very well, back to studying and trying to get a new career with three kids in tow, with a tight financial budget. Smiling to the outside world. Yes im holding it together for everyones sake, when will 'I' find happiness i feel i so rightly deserve after 14 miserable years with my ex, who was a control freak, and a womaniser.
I dont think this blog makes much sense, i just had to get some of my feelings down, theres no easy solutions, and the bad days are getting far and few between, i read some of the blogs on here, and some people have some very sad stories to tell, makes me put my own into perspective. I try and list all the good things i have in my life which does outway the bad, but when you have a sh*t day its difficult to find something to feel happy about.
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alan670
said:
| May 01, 2008 | ||
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Starry Thats what you will find the blog so helpful with. It doesn't really matter if it makes sense but you will certainly feel better for it. Good luck, i'm sure you will find some happiness, probably when you least expect it. Alan |
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marriaa
said:
| May 02, 2008 | ||
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you sound that you are well on the way to getting your life together so do mot let little things like that get in the way.have a nice weekend | |
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mike62
said:
| May 02, 2008 | ||
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Starry, It is always the silliest things that de-rail us. You are doing tremendously well in holding it all together and moving forward. Well done you! The emotional pendulum carries on swinging and unfortunately, when we least expect it, something gives it a knock and the emotions spill over again. It is perfectly natural. Many would have retreated within themselves, but you have had the strength to keep moving on. It is often really difficult to say exactly what is wrong with us, when it seeems to be everything, all at once. As you say, the bad days get fewer, but when we do have one, it SEEMS terrible. Tomorrow is another day, and hopefully a better one. Just keep on plodding away and be nice to yourself. Mike |
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starry_eyes
said:
| May 02, 2008 | ||
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Thank you Alan, Mariaa, and lovely Mike, today is another day, and the suns out, still feeling a bit low but not as much as yesterday. Kept myself busy so far today, had an extra long work out at they gym, i find a great way to take out all your emotions, and spoke to a few regulars there which is always nice, then logged on to wicki and read lovely words of support, we'll get there! x hugs | |
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gorgeous
said:
| May 03, 2008 | ||
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Heres hoping a good sleep will help says she its 2.00am  Im not out ofthe downer yet but hopin i will soon. Big hug x |
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MMM
said:
| May 25, 2008 | ||
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Hi I read your blog ad I really admire you! I am facing a divorce( have known for the last 4 months that my husband is having an affair and planning his future with her ( we've been together 26 yrs). My sons are doing first year exams at university and AS levels at sixth form so I have taken the lead and insisted we say nothing until they have finished in late june . It's been a nightmare!!! You have given me so much encouragment to hold my head high and survive. It's his loss!!!! Thank you MMM x |
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