Partings

March

The next few days were unreal. The books came the shirts came and I resized my ring and started wearing it. Sharon did not show any remorse or any inclination to change she was determined to enjoy herself. Regardless of the cost to the family.

She told me that any man paying her attention would probably end up sleeping with her if he wanted. Both Sharon's parents had died before they reached sixty and this was another motivator. She feels she has to make the most of the time she has left.

The main thing Sharon kept saying was that she should not have confessed, "telling the truth has done me no favours" and that she shouldn't have let me meet her main lover.

It came out that he had a girl friend, aged 21 and only saw Sharon when it suited him. Sharon had much stronger feelings for him than he did for her but that was not a view she wanted to hear.

It hurt me that she'd discussed with my daughter the possibility of me leaving and her lover moving in. Sharon was keen to tell me that my daughter "wasn't bothered". I feel that this is something I can not challenge for my daughter's sake.

I found myself calling my son's school to tell them he'd be off and leaving a message for the head of pastoral care to call me back. I explained the marriage was in trouble to a stranger on the phone.

I needed to tell my family, in person. This meant a trip to see them the coming weekend.

I struggle into work. Most people are shocked by my news. I talk to various people about finding a solicitor.

None fitted the bill so searching on the internet I come across a large company who I'll call IM. They have won awards but also seem to have a no nonsense reputation.

I call and ask for an appointment. They offer me one on the Friday. I pause then tell the lady on the line, "I don't want a solicitor to understand me and offer support, I want one that can get nasty." There was a short pause on the line "the person you want is on holiday this week, I'll make you an appointment on Wednesday next week."

April

The second night after my sweet talk session I was in the mood for reality. My wife and I were still having sex. Sunday morning, and truly terrible sex with my wife. Sharon barely took part, I felt dreadful. I thought to myself this is doing you no good and told her later that I thought we should stop having sex. Sharon laughed, "yeah till the next time you want some". No I thought never again with you.

There followed an uneasy day. Punctuated by Sharon asking me for £250 to re- pay her aunt. There'd been a call from door to door sales company about her overdue money and clearly that's where the house keeping was heading.

Tired I went to bed around midnight. Sharon stayed up talking to her men. Setting up meetings for later in the week when I was away. I'm writing this in the airport, offline, waiting for my flight home. Although it no longer feels like I'm going home.

Later I heard the front door go. I thought Sharon had waited for me to fall asleep and sneaked out. I jumped out of bed to investigate. I was wrong she hadn't but there followed a blazing row at 3.30 am. It end with Sharon lunging for me and trying to hit me whilst I was still in bed. She slipped and fell and comically rolled off me down the bed. Next thing she was screaming I'd hit her with a nightie and a soft toy. "You'll be saying we had a pillow fight next" I shouted. My daughter came in. My wife went out to my daughter's bedroom to show her what I was supposed to have done to her. In 5 minutes she's back and gets into bed, anther 5 minutes and she's sound asleep. I thought she'd stay in my daughter's room after such an allegation.

I think it's dawned on Sharon that the facts don't put her in a good light and she needs things to put me down. I'm not sure where this will go.

Next morning we get up for an airport run. My wife is determined to blank me and we have an unpleasant journey to the airport. I must admit I tried to wind her up on the way but she was having none of it. Unusually my daughter got up to chaperone us on the way.