How my marriage broke down...

This is my first blog ever -anywhere!

Boxing Day 2006 my next door neighbours husband was killed in a car crash.

Ex and I had only lived next to them for 18 months but it was in a small group of 5 houses in the country and we got on well with them. I had became close to her even though she had certain character traits that weren't so attractive (lied about silly things all the time).

Needless to say it was tragic and friends andfamily all rallied round to support her. I work full-time and do shift work,my ex works part-time in the summer and researches and writes in the winter. My ex and the chapwho died got on well and my husband became very withdrawn. My ex used to pop next door when I wasnt there but stuff like that has never bother me because I am not a jealous type. But as the days passed my ex became more depressed and withdrawn from me.

One night I invited her round for a meal with us and the whole evening she just spoke to him and came out with the 'oh, I get on better with men' line. I spoke to him about other odd comments she had made and he just said that I had a vendetta against her. I knew in that split second I was losing him.

Meanwhile she was getting her hook into the dead chaps best friend.

My ex was going round there 4 or 5 times a day. When I asked him if he really liked her he said he thought he was in love with her. That broke my heart because I hdn't been able to complete with someone who could trot out the line that her husband was dead.

I didn't confront her at this point but asked my ex not to see her whilst we tried to sort ourselves out a bit. He said he wouldn't see her but he lied and 2 weeks later he said that he was still going round there but didn't know what he wanted, especially as she was 'sniffing round' (her words not mine) he dead husbands best (married ) friend. This strange stand off continued until 4 weeks later when I can home early from a night shift.

Ex wasn't in the house but all the lights were on, so I rung him. I knew in a second where he was because he wanted to know where I was. I ran into the garden and the only light on in her house was her bedroom light.

He said he wasn't humping her and I did and do belive him - I think I interrupted it that night. I was devasted and told him he was leaving the next day. I was so in love with him and supported him in any way I could.

I carried on being civil to her. She brought my house key round and said that he hadn't said anything to her about his feelings, that she wasn't interested in men blah blah blah...

If you have got this far in the story well done ... bit sad writing this so going to disappear for a blub.