Confused

I've only been separated for a few weeks now but have become friends with someone who works at the gym I go to. We flirt, have a laugh, usually have a coffee and a chat before or after my workout and last week he asked me if I'd like to go for a drink with him. I said yes as I really like him but I don't know if he wants us to just be friends or if he wants something more. He didnt try anything on with me when we went for the drink but has said he would like to go out again.

I'm really confused but too scared to ask him outright in case he only wants to be friends and I then go and scare him off for being too needy/desperate/intense.

Also, is it too soon to be even thinking about dating anyway?

I have no clue - please tell me it gets easier to work these things out????

Just enjoy the moment. He obviously likes being with you or he wouldn't ask for your company, so enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!

Life's too short to worry about whether it is too soon to start a relationship. You are obviously starting off as friends and if something more develops, great. If not, he has been a wonderful stepping stone into a new and fantastic life x

just go for it, have fun, and enjoy time spent with someone who wants to be with you, life is short enough grab the moment while u can I reckon, he obviously didnt try to get you into bed on your first date, so at least you know thats not the reason he,s keen to see you, have fun, ausgirl

Honey - do what feels right for you - when you are ready.
I had a short friendship/relationship with someone on this site virtually & then met for real once after talking on the phone for weeks - weird but he was a great support in the early days but we both knew it was only going to be short term becaus the timing and age difference was all wrong!!! However he did lift my spirits and give me a stepping stone back to the real me!!! He was /is a special person.
Don't invest your emotions until you know you are healed enough to cope - you don't need any more hurt!
Good luck - you never know it may develop into something beautiful but if not just enjoy the moment!!!
Good luck!

Hi sushi. Just chill out. See where this goes and see what develops. Your putting way to much presure on yrself. Just calm down. But remember that you are vulnrable. Take your time and get to know him 1st as friends. Good relationships are built on good freindships. But if this doesnt go anywhere it doesnt matter. Enjoy what you have. C.

Sushigirl

Its a pleasure to spend time with someone who is easy to be around....so appreciate it for what it is and just enjoy it.If you gain a good friendship great....if more develops...thats great too but just enjoy the moment!

lovelorn

Hi SushiG,

Alot of good positive responses to your post.

So hope I don't offend with mine.

My wife said very early on that she is reading to move on and start dating etc.
I said I thought it was way too soon. Show yourself & me some respect. I felt it was like all the good years we had meant nothing at all.

Don't get me wrong all situ's are difficult where separation, divorce and kids are envolved.

I suppose my wife has and is way ahead of me in the emotional stakes.
But I still say to my wife I can't get my head round where she is. This is not helped by the fact that she uses it to upset & wind me up.

For me I am still struggling to come to terms with the fact that it has all fallen apart. So relationships are the last thing on my mind. Funny thing is though a pal of mine tells me that my wife is adamant that I am seeing someone. I put this down to her feeling guilty that she is! IMO its also so very much rebound. There is no way that who ever she is seeing (hopefully its only one guy) will be with her for the rest of her days.

Having said all I have I can understand why people want to move on and a bit of flirting and adult relations can be good.

Hope this doesn't seem to negative.

L4N