Who should pay.

My partner has his children every Thursday evening from 5.30pm. He takes them to school every Friday morning and then on alternate Fridays he arranges for the children to attend after school club which he pays for and then has contact until sunday evening.

Whilst the children are with him, he pays for all their clothes etc. He covers 50% of the sick/inset days and has them for a minimum of 4 weeks holiday a year.

He pays the CSA rate of CM, pays for half of all school clothes such as coats, shoes, school bags, half of school trips, clubs, passports etc.

However his ex isnt happy and is now claiming that he should pay her to be his children 'minder' on a Thursday from end of school to the time he collects them. The ex doesnt work on a thursday and is unable to because she acts as child minder (unpaid) for her friends children.

He has always said to her if and when the children attend registered childcare on a
thursday, he would pay for half but doesnt see why he should pay her to look after her own children.

Who is responsible for the time between the end of school and when his contact starts?at 5.30?

why does contact begin at 5:30pm? is it court ordered that way or is it historical? Is he 'allowed' to pick them up from school rather than have them in afterschool club?

Jaymdee: When will they ever stop!!

It is very plain for all rational and reasonable persons that anything PRE 5.30pm is in mummy's time.

I think your BF is being very reasonable saying once they attend registered childcare he will pay half... (even though he doesn't need to - this is what he pays his child maintenance for).

Some parents eh!!!!

Its historical. That's the time she decided that contact started.

He cant pick them up from school because of work commitments and she wont allow them to attend after school club on a thursday, (we tried that!!!) as 'she wants to collect them from school'.

What would the CSA or even a court say.

Would they make him pay or would it be considered technically spousal maintenance which she wouldn't be entitled to because her net income is actually greater than his.

I know that this will grate on some people so please accept my apologies up front as that is not my intention.

Why is it that some RP’s decide the rules of contact and then change the goal posts at will for the NRP.

How can a RP honestly expect a NRP to pay them for looking after their own child? We had a similar experience when my bf (NRP) asked (RP) to have the children as he was away on a course (career change). The RP made my bf feel like he was actually begging her to have the children for him and that she was doing him a huge favour looking after the children. He called a halt to negotiations when she demanded money to have them during his court appointed time.

What on earth happened to rationale and reason.

Jaymdee, a court would find it petty and the CSA wouldn't take a blind bit of notice as long as he is paying the CSA they state.

The only worry you have is the RP kicking up a fuss, your bf has made his point, stick to it and let her whinge. You have been through a lot worse babe....

The problem is that the financial stuff is being held up because of this claim from her.

Its been on going for a year.

She just wont listen and it keeps going around in a circle. Her current claim is that my partner should pay her £100 a month in spousal maintenance until the youngest is 18 to cover this cost!!!

Do we really have to pay £££'s in court costs just to make it go away??