Declaration of independence

I started writing the following as a (quite random) blog post, but I ran out of steam. It might end up as a blog post, but I think I need some further suggestions and ideas.

The post was to be called 'declaration of independence'. Here's what I've got so far:

After a marriage has run its course and one party has decided to go their separate ways, then both parties, in good time, will be able to assert their true independence and begin to live their life to the full, with liberty, to pursue happiness, in whatever form this may take.

You shall be able to make your own decisions about what you wish to do, without thoughts as to what a spouse may think. Through this liberty you can choose what you wish to eat, at what time, without feeling guilty.

You shall be free from minor or major dispersions of character and will no longer have to consider how best to present your point of view.

You no longer have to give Christmas cards to members of a family you temporarily acquired through legislation, or have to pretend that you like the gifts that they give you.

Holidays are no longer opportunities for disagreement but can instead become extraordinary moments for personal growth and adventure.

The chores that you have to do as a part of day to day living are, from this point onwards, always done in the right way.

The money that you once shared is now your own: you can spend it on superfluous frippery or give it away to any person or organisation. Negotiation is no longer a necessity. Financial decisions are now a freedom of choice. Every purchase, no matter how small, is an ­expression­ of that choice.

Opinions and stories can now be voiced without hearing groans of derision and the oft echoed phrase of, ‘they’ve already heard that one before…’. Your words are now your own to choose. Use your words to present and to share the new stories that you create and uncover as you discover your new liberty.


(what next!? Please feel free to post some further quasi-legally worded vaguely comedic but acidly true suggestions)

Best,

JJ

(suffering from an overactive brain!)

Funny JJ. And I can't wait until I feel as liberated as you sound

Survive
x

Hello again jj,

You no longer have to give Christmas cards to members of a family you temporarily acquired through legislation, or have to pretend that you like the gifts that they give you.

2 years ago my M-I-L presented me with 2 single brown bed sheets for my Christmas present, bearing in mind that this took place in front of a room full of people that she did not know too well! Having been her D-I-L for nearly 20 years, I was astonished. One I have a double bed, 2 there in nothing brown in my house ( I have my own individual taste) and 3 I could have slapped her face at the insult! I am so glad that this year I do not have to be reminded just how little I was obviously thought of by my STBX's family. The D-I-L who would have walked to China over hot coals for any of them, had they asked me to, once upon a time!

Thanks for the reminder my friend of why I am so much better off without the lot of them!

P.S. Lovely thread/potential blog. Looking forward to spring!


Take care for now FoS x

Free from harsh blame for things in his life going wrong.

Free from long silences, blank stares and someone being emotionally absent

Free to be the person that I was always meant to be

Free to meet my own potential

And FOS the horror of those brown sheets! I think you are like me in the sense you would spend ages picking the right gifts, really wanting everything to be perfect for the in law family. I was that kind of DIL too. Thats why you must have wanted to slap them.

My MIL on seeing the home that my husband and I brought (I still live here) said "hmmm its ok for a starter home" She nearly did get a slap, I live in a three bedroomed detached property overlooking the countryside! Cheeky indeed.....

Not only do you not have to pretend to like the gifts the in laws give you, you don't have to pretend to like the in laws ...

Love the one about your own potential, SG.

You no longer have to go through the commercial ritual which is valentines day, necessarily attending an overpriced overcrowded restaurant since no partner wishes to accept the tyranny of the cooking.

Great Post JJ,
Great comments Flower and Shoe Girl!!
The comments made me laugh and remember the reasons why I made the decision all those years ago.
Puts everything into perspective.
Only YOU can decide what you want from life.
Only YOU can decide to follow that intuition.
There is no right or wrong paths to take.
There is always hope that the troubles you encounter today are not around tomorrow.

Enjoy the Liberation!