11 years together

Up at half 5 again this morning. This is when my day starts to get hard. Firstly I lie in bed thinking about a future alone and I start daydreaming that maybe she's going to change her mind (when I know that she definitely won't).
Then pretty soon I'm off to collect the kids for the school run which is by far the hardest part.
Firstly I have to see my wife which always makes it even more real because I can't hug or kiss her. Then I'm back into that normal family environment as an outsider

Why don't the kids sleep with you from time to time? It would be easier for you to get them to school...

There are lots of things in flux right now, I get that. Just don't settle when it comes to your kids. They need you in their life in a real way. Not just as a driver.

Thanks for your comment Canuck.
I've spoken to my wife and we're getting started with the shared nights.
We've changed from our original thinking and now I'm going to have them all day Sunday plus Sunday night, Monday and Tuesday night then she'll have them Wednesday, Thursday Friday nights, all day Saturday and then we'll alternate Saturday nights.
It remains to be seen if she'll stick to this arrangement but I do insist on them staying with me 50% of the time in one way or other and I'll happily go down the mediation/legal route if needs be.

I think the more stable the agreement is then the more likely it will work.

My partner had 50/50 shared residency, but because of the mad arrangement his ex insisted on with multiple changeovers and the children not knowing one day to the next where they would be it didnt work out.

The children were extremely distressed by the situation. My partner tried to change the contact to the pattern you had suggest as he thought this would work the best. However is ex refused to consider the change and in the end my partner decided to accept a reduction in contact time, rather than fighting through the courts to maintain the 50/50 split.

The children are much happier and relaxed now and enjoy being with him.

You need to make sure whatever arrangement you agree to,it is in the best interest of the children not because it suits you.

I absolutely agree with you that the kids are the most important factor.
I don't think days dotted about here and there would work but as I say, I do believe the kids should be with me 50% of the time so I pray this system we are trying sticks.
I believe a father is as important as a mother and therefore the time should be split equally which is why I would happily fight for 50/50.

Gah, there's always something isn't there.
You think you're doing fine and then you get a text and think "oh, I wonder if that's...."
No. It isn't. She left me