Why do I still care?

I know I have kept my holier than thou head on for ages, and yet every now and then it just slips.
He lost the OW when she found out hat he wasn't separated and that I knew nothing.
That was the source of his depressions and stress because she was the "love of his life".
Well 6 months on and he is dating again , I checked his phone like you do.
Anyway he went away this morning to spend the weekend at a "boring company thing" and won't be back until tomorrow PM. Except I saw the tickets and the texts. He is off to a Ball in London with his new piece.

Why does it still hurt?
Why does it still have anything to do with me?

I thought I had accepted what was happening, what was done, what he was like, and moved on to my new zen state.

Doesn't appear to be the case tonight.

(((hugs)))). It still hurts because we always want to believe in the bestof our exes-and just when you think you've got it all sorted out, they continue to lie and cheat and it dumps us right back at the start again.It feels a bit like a merry-go-round.
But be strong. You do not deserve to be treated like this and take comfort from the fact that this liaision probably won't last either.
Concentrate on you.

When my tired and upset small child wants Daddy I find it incredibly hard to bite my tongue and not say "he's not here because he has decided to shag other women"
I secretly harbour the desire that one day she will see me as the good one in this and see him for what he is.

She will. My daughter is now 10 and nobody's fool when it comes to her father.She is polite to him(well brought up LOL)but in the privacy of our home, she has obviously formed her own opinion of his character and it's not very flattering.(but very accurate!)
Your daughter, as she gets older, will see straight through him and when she asks questions ,be factual and truthful.
Sadly,my daughter learnt of her father's behaviour through being caught up in the thick of his very public affair-its taken her 3 years to come to terms with it and she's only recently started to see him.
She is very reserved around him and hangs back-completely unlike her usual huggy self. Her older brothers get all the hugs and cuddles....his loss!

Because you thought he was your friend and you had his support?

Because he led you to believe he was a "better man".

But guess he was just fooling you, and that's what hurts!

Kids have a way of seeing us for what we are, eventually.

Yes you will have to "bite your tongue" and tell whites to cover for him, but that won't be for forever.

Loads of (((Hugs))) Furball to you and your little one!

I only hope that you can get through in this..

I still care as well. When her lover dumped her she was destroyed, a mess. It did not give me pleasure. Not at all.

I think the person that decides to leave the marriage is so far ahead of us that are left. I know my wife told me she has been thinking about leaving for 3-4 years. I really had no idea. So, in her mind it was a done deal and she was just letting me know. In my mind it was a fresh shock.

Know that you'll get through it and you'll be better. Believe it. I know I do.